VCH's Journal

 Seeking God's wisdom and direction. Spent a good portion of the morning in repentance.. my heart and mind had felt so contaminated.  When I moved here, I did not have that many expectations and the few I had have certainly met with some interesting changes and challenges. And the many that I did not have have seem to bombard me at times.  I do love the hills, the pace, the animals~ God's creation is easily visible...and breathtaking.  I am just now settling into my job of a little over 2 months... which does not even pay enough to live on nor have any benefits...who can do without health insurance nowdays?  I have the opportunity to return to what really is my home, Memphis. I moved there when I was 18, raised my daughter there, and did not even realize until I returned to my 'hometown" of where I grew up that it truly was not my home ~ Kind of like that scene on Spiderman where the Green Goblin is attempting to make Spiderman choose between his girl and a group of kids and the folks from NY are gathered on the bridge and start throwing things at him and saying "you mess with one of us, you mess with all of us." A city is like that.  Everyone always says Memphis is just a big little town. And that is true.  IT certainly has its problems, but it was home, it was my life.  An interesting thing; the day I was moving here - a spot i the road where no rain was there was a prefect rainbow and I felt in my heart heart God say "I am faithful" and when I tortured myself recently trying to figure out whether to stay or return, I felt Him speak to my heart again " The rainbow is there and visible from both directions. I am with you I am faithful."  So either way, He is always there for me. What an incredible God!