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vanillabean 
12:04pm, February 20, 2009
It's been awhile since I've written. I've been busy with our new puppy Maverick. He is a 10 week old Akita and we've had him for 2 weeks now. I never thought I would get another dog this soon after Jasper's passing and a part of me felt guilty. I worked through that guilt quickly and am so glad to have Maverick in my life. I love him so much and am enjoying every minute with him (even the potty accidents and constant chewing). A part of me felt I was being disloyal to Jasper. I've worked through those feelings and know Jasper would be happy that I'm not crying all the time. Yesterday was the first day that I didn't shed a tear for Jasper. I usually have tearful moments (mostly at night) but it is no longer the all day tearfulness. I've had signs from Jasper and know that he is happy and in a much better place. He's moved on and now I must start moving on and learn to live without him. His love for me and my love for him will always be in my heart and I have so many good memories that I will cherish for the rest of my life. I finally got Jasper's ashes back from the vet on Monday so he is resting in our family room. I kiss his picture and talk to him everyday. I miss him so much and wish I could see and hug him again. I know one of these days I will. God has blessed us with another wonderful dog and my focus is on him. He deserves the same love and attention that we gave Jasper. He's not Jasper and is unique and we look forward to making lots of good memories with him. I feel Jasper everyday and know that he is smiling and is happy for me.
