tonysheart2006's Journal

Hi,

I am sorry I have not been on here much. I will return all of your hugs in a minute :) It is nice of you to think of me.

One thing led to another and well lets start

June 1, 2007: I found out that my landlord aka slumlord got into my electric account, she told me herself and then kicked me out all of the sudden saying I lied to her when I didn't --thats the short version of it. She was very mean and abusive to me. She told me all of these things to get me to take the place, lied about the safety of the place and neighborhood, then took told me something just the opposite of what she said I could have, so I am back down in Frederick MD now at my old place in the smaller room renting. Honestly? Tony never kept his promise and moved in and I am not good at being all by myself so I was getting depressed up there all by myself anyways.

Since about 2 months ago Tony has gone down hill both mentally and physically. His problem feeling certain areas got worse to the point where he cant even feel you know what or you know what else, so he is afraid to be intimate otherwise he might mess himself. However he didnt tell me this until the other day, he pretty much just stopped initiating hugs, kisses and attention. He told me they took his dignity and he feels humiliated. They took his workers comp to try and scare him to give up the fight and to try and video him going back to work so they could win. The months of arbitration are wearing on him as neither side gives an inch.

It got so bad he broke up with me several times and made excuses why he couldn't see me when I asked. We are sorta together, but hanging on by a thread.

Now he found out he may have lung cancer and he hasnt wanted me at any of his appointments. I feel horrible.