I was talking to a friend of mine tonight. She told me that her sister was thinking of leaving her husband. She said that he is very independent and that her sister is not. In addition, her sister's husband likes to go out dancing and her sister does not. She gets very insecure when he goes out dancing even though he has invited her to come many times. Regardless of the amount of reassurance by him she never feels comforted.
This is a good example of how one's own insecurities are causing stress in a relationship. Because there is no evidence that her husband is doing anything that would harm the relationship, this issue really is not about the couple but the individual. To create a healthier relationship her sister must find a way to challenge her insecurities and find a way to be comfortable in her own skin.
For instance, if she is worried that her husband will cheat while out dancing and he has not done anything of concern, then she has to figure out what self-perception is driving her anxiety. Let's say she believes she is not attractive or fun. Then that is the belief that needs to be challenged and changed to a more realistic positive perspective. The truth seems to be that her husband loves her but just likes to dance. Acting on his desire to dance has nothing to do with her being attractive or fun. A more positive self-image and peace of mind will begin to emerge when she is able to embrace this new perception.
Therapy is a great place to work on issues related to self-esteem and insecurities. Sometimes therapy acts as gym for the brain to help change negative self thoughts. Growing new mental muscles or new ways to think about situations that otherwise find us stuck in old destructive patterns is crucial towards maintaining a healthy relationship.