Should All Acquaintence Be Forgot, It's Still Healthy To Reminisce by Cyndi Sarnoff-Ross/Marriage and Family Therapist: at DailyStrength Doctors and Advisors

Cyndi Sarnoff-Ross is a licensed psychotherapist with almost twenty years of clinical experience in the fields of clinical psychology and organizational management. She has worked extensively with a wide variety of…

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Should All Acquaintence Be Forgot, It's Still Healthy To Reminisce

Posted in Depression by Cyndi Sarnoff-Ross on Dec 31, 2010

"Auld Lang Syne"

This is a phrase we really only hear at this time of year, yet its meaning is rarely ever understood. It literally translates in English to “old long since” or more clearly “long long ago.”

I love the scene at the end of 1989 film When Harry Met Sally when Harry asks the question, “I mean, 'Should old acquaintance be forgot?' Does that mean that we should forget old acquaintances, or does it mean if we happened to forget them, we should remember them, which is not possible because we already forgot?"

That is an excellent question! There are several versions of the song, depending upon the region in which they are sung, but they all say roughly the same thing.

At the end of each year people often want to say good-bye to the old by reviewing it. This is actually a healthy habit. We see endless retrospectives on television and in magazines that highlight the best and worst of the past year. Most of what we see we remember easily but sometimes the images bring back memories that have faded, and with them so too the lessons.

Collectively we experience the world and its current events and collectively we make assessments and store away the most salient memories while each of us have our own personal take and emotional response to these events.

Why not take a moment at the close of this year to bring this exercise home. Sit down with your family or loved ones and do a year in review. Talk about the good times and the bad, the lessons learned and the memories that you want to hold onto forever. Mention some things that you are really proud of accomplishing in this past year and those things you are committed to improve upon. It may even mean making an effort to connect to people you care about but didn’t get to spend time with in the past year, lest you make the mistake of forgetting old and valued acquaintances.

As you do this, have each person write these things down and keep your list from each year as a reminder and your own personal retrospective. If it has been a particularly hard year then focus on the things you actually have the power to change in the new one. If it has been a year full of joy, revisit what worked and how to carry that over into the New Year.

It is a good habit to be reflective and one that when done thoughtfully can bring deeper meaning to your life and your relationships.

If you are so inspired to sing this traditional tune this New Year’s Eve, then below is the lyrics to one common version for you to enjoy. May your memories of the past 365 days help guide you to a healthy and Happy New Year.

Should old acquaintance be forgot,
And never brought to mind ?
Should old acquaintance be forgot,
And old lang syne ?

CHORUS:
For auld lang syne, my dear,
For auld lang syne,
We'll take a cup of kindness yet,
For auld lang syne.

Best,
Cyndi