Parenting and The Valentine's Day Project by Cyndi Sarnoff-Ross/Marriage and Family Therapist: at DailyStrength Doctors and Advisors

Cyndi Sarnoff-Ross is a licensed psychotherapist with almost twenty years of clinical experience in the fields of clinical psychology and organizational management. She has worked extensively with a wide variety of…

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Parenting and The Valentine's Day Project

Posted in Parenting Big K... by Cyndi Sarnoff-Ross on Feb 13, 2013

Let me start by saying that I admittedly sort of dread the ritual of facilitating the process of my daughter’s preparation of all those little Valentine’s Day cards that will be passed out to every single child in her class. I realize this sounds curmudgeonly, but then most of the parents I know feel the exact same way.

In fact, I just read an article by a mom who was considering a Valentine’s Day rebellion. She was so put off by the whole idea of her kids writing all of these anonymous cards and then spending the entire morning crisscrossing the cloakroom to put these cards in all the little boxes.

Her children’s school, like many schools, asks that, in the interest of time, the notes not be addressed to anyone specifically but simply just signed by the giver. This too made it seem impersonal and silly to her. She was just going to have her kids write a few special notes and call it a day. After further consideration she changed her mind.

The truth is, it’s not that big a deal for us to go to the store and buy a packet of tiny cards, or better yet, provide our kids with some paper and colored pens to create their own. It helps kids to feel a part of something, which is a huge component of development in childhood.

The entire ritual of looking through the box at the end of the day to see if there is a special note from the boy or girl you have a secret crush on is pretty sweet. I suppose the absence of that special note is a mini preparation for the inevitable heartbreaks of the future. In some small way the exercise teaches kids about giving and graciously receiving.

Even the Valentine’s Day rebellion mom had to admit that her kids’ enthusiasm for this process of giving, and their happiness at receiving, all those little, albeit anonymous, notes made the effort worthwhile.

So it is with enthusiasm, or at least understanding, of my own that I will get out those multi-colored markers and cheer my daughter on as she creates 40 plus Valentine’s Day cards again this year.

What do you think about this sort of thing? Silly, or sweet?

- Cyndi

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