Discussion Topic
Have You Been Called An Ice Queen???
Posted on 10/12/09, 01:30 pm
By your own husband because you were going through menopause? And You had a Medical hysterectomy which brought it on eirlirer then you would have nornaly gone through it? Have you had your husband ask you to go out and have outher sexual parterners since you had no sex drive because of your menopause? What would you do after 14 years of devoted marriage if you husband had asked and done these things to you? Oh YA and there was nereve damage from the hysterectomy!!!!
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Reply #1 10/12/09 6:56pm
Clearly he has no idea what you are going through and if he thinks that having sex with other people will help well then he is truly misguided and maybe he just doesn't want to know. Sounds like he's thinking with the smaller head at the moment. Can you talk to him, will he go to the doctor with you and be prepared to listen and he should consider himself lucky that menopause has made you take an axe to him ... just joking but I know it can be like that. I hope he will take the time to listen to you, all the best. -
Reply #2 10/13/09 6:02pm
Ask him if he's Ok with you getting a different sexual partner just to see if you'll feel any different with somebody kinder and more considerate than he.... -
Reply #3 10/14/09 8:27pm
You must be feeling very hurt, I'm so sorry. -
Reply #4 10/17/09 6:12pm
Know I find out it could all be due to the way the doctor did my hysterectomy. They did a partial first then 3 years later removed my overies.Because one was dead and infected and the was the size of a grape fruit and cove with systs that were popping and bleeing internaly. There is probably scar tissue and lession and nerve damage. I have to go in next month and be check out. But the only way they can tell if there is scar tissue and lessions is to do a scope. The blood test all came back and it does help I have no testotarone(spelling).After that they figure what is going on they want me to go in and have monthly shots of the crap. Am I going to grow facial hair??? Which is the two of the is worse no sex drive or growing a mustach and a beard??? I know I don't want the pain any more that I an haveing. I move just right and it feels as if someone is stabbing and pulling a knife through my lower tummy. Almost as bad as before I had the hysterectomy. We will see what the doctors say next month. -
Reply #5 10/18/09 11:14am
Hi Pep....don't worry, women today can lead normal lives post hysterectomy. The testosterone is normal in women. We do also have it, just not as much as men. It is part of a balance with Progesterone and Estrogen. Ask your doc about a cream rather than pills or shots. They are tolerated better and you have more control over how much you use.
Don't fret, this will get better.
As for the pain, that is definitely a separate issue. If you have no internal reproductive organs, there should be no pain unless something else is going on. Have they checked your bladder? It could have fallen out of place and causing stress on your ligaments and tendons. It is easy to fix. They just "sling" it up back where it belongs. Once you have a hysterectomy, the other organs and fat/tissues in your abdomen fill in that space. So things do have a potential to get out of whack.
Maybe it is time for a new doc?!
As for your hubby, have him go with you to the doc and let the doc explain to him what is going on. That way he wont be so ignorant about your situation.
But once you get on the right hormonal treatments, because your body is not making them anymore you must replace them, especially to protect your bones and heart, you will feel much better. The only thing that might need extra help is in getting a good lubricant because it is common to have dryness.
Have you considered couples counseling? -
Reply #6 10/22/09 10:09pm
Well the doctor has found trat my testsaron in at total zero. Now they need to find out if medicade will cover the shots my docotor does't perscribe the creams so it will have to be the shot.My Doctor say aloof people over dose themselfs on the creams And to top it all off they belieieve I do have lesions on the right side starting from the top of the cervic to the colon and on t the bladder and even the liver I have to take a crein type of medication to soften the scar tssue every other night fo two weeks and then go back to th doctor an if that hasn't done anything the will have to go in with a scope remove it all. They told me will be in the hosptal for 3 to 4 dys. It just isn't a day surgery. Expeciay if it is attached to the colon and the liver. So Now I am I mega pain meds andthe meds to soten the scar tissue andalotof bedrest. And 100% NO sex untl we know what is going on for sure.
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