Discussion Topic

what your pets write in their diaries..FUNNY

Posted on 11/26/08, 10:05 pm
EXCERTS FROM THE DOGS DIARY......


8:00 am - Dog food! My favorite thing!
9:30 am - A car ride! My favorite thing!
9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favorite thing!
10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!
12:00 pm - Lunch! My favorite thing!
1:00 pm - Played in the yard! My favorite thing!
3:00 pm - Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!
5:00 pm - Milk Bones! My favorite thing!
7:00 pm - Got to play ball! My favorite thing!
8:00 pm - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing!
11:00 pm - Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!

EXCERTS FROM A CATS DIARY


Day 983 of my captivity...

My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects.
They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed
hash or some sort of dry nuggets.

Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I
nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength.

The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt
to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet.

Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet.
I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly
demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made
condescending comments about what a 'good little hunter' I am. Bastards.

There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was
placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I
could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my
confinement was due to the power of 'allergies.' I must learn what this
means and how to use it to my advantage.

Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my
tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this
again tomorrow -- but at the top of the stairs.

I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches.
The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released - and
seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded.

The bird has got to be an informant. I observe him communicating with
the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My
captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so
he is safe. For now................








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Showing 1 - 10 of 12 Replies
  • Reply #1 11/27/08  10:59am
    thanks, I love it:) Robbin
  • Reply #2 11/29/08  1:18am
    Thanks Robin, you joke protrays dogs and cats most accurately ....LOL
  • Reply #3 11/29/08  8:50am
    That was great
  • Reply #4 11/29/08  10:54am
    my two little dogs say "i love you unconditionally" everytime i look at them....no man's ever said that and meant it! smile
  • Reply #5 11/29/08  5:45pm
    Lily, I love you unconditionally!
  • Reply #6 11/30/08  8:38am
    That is a keeper!!!Must share!!!!
  • Reply #7 12/01/08  6:53am
    That's why I have a dog.
  • Reply #8 12/02/08  2:48am
    thats why i own 2..lol
  • Reply #9 12/05/08  1:20am
    that made me chuckle. Im gonna steal that
  • Reply #10 10/22/09  9:38pm
    luv it.

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