The Fine Art of Trying.

When You are dealing with depression on a daily basis there is one thing you learn ~~ You learn To TRY! Sometimes that is all there is to do ~~ TO TRY. No medication can help make you TRY. That is something we must pull up from the very depths of our souls. Yes this is something we must TRY & do every day. Our survival depends upon on it. TO TRY becomes our daily struggle. TO TRY becomes our way of life. TO TRY is what we must do. TO TRY + survival on it's most basic level.

When I wake up ~ each day.
When i have to decide ~ each day.
When I can even get out of bed ~ each day.
I must at least TRY.

Can I accomplish what needs to be done?
Can I care for my family,friends ,pets,etc.?
Can I do what I should?
I must at least TRY.

Who can I trust?
Who can I depend on?
Who can I help?
I must at least TRY.

Who will today bring in my life ~~ unclear.
What will today confront me with ~~ unclear
Where will today lead ~~ unclear.
But at least I nust TRY.

Will I find happiness ~~ I hope.
Will I find answers ~~ I hope.
Will I find support ~~ I hope.
I must at least TRY.

To TRY is to care.
To TRY is to seek hope.
To TRY is to keep moving on.
I must at least TRY.

Do I always succeed ~ no.
Do I always move on ~ no.
Do I always care ~ no.
I must at least TRY.

Do I feel pain ~ yes.
Do I cry ~ yes.
Do I feel alone ~ yes.
But I must at least TRY.

How do I sleep ~ poorly.
How do I cope ~ poorly.
How do I work ~ poorly.
But I must at least TRY.

Will I overcome my depression ~~ unsure.
Wyll I ever move beyond this point ~~ unsure.
Will I ever feel real joy ~~ unsure.
But I must at least TRY.

What is there to do ~~ TRY.
At least if I TRY, I still have hope.
If I TRY I still have the capacity to care.
if I TRY I have not given up entirely.

When depression has me in it's hold.
There is no light at the end of the tunnel.
There is no peace in my soul.
There is no joy in my heart.

There is however doubt in my judgement.
There is however a deep sense of loss.
There is however utter confusion.
There is however no where to turn.

When depression is at it's strongest.
I fail to see the good in life.
I fail to understand, tomorrow is another day.
I fail to even care about tomorrow.

People like me ~~ do suffer.
People like me ~~ do reject life.
People like me ~~ do stop caring.
People like me ~~ do feel empty.

We learn lessons the hard way.
We learn Families find us hard to understand.
We learn to conceal & to hide our turmoil.
We learn depression is REAL.

We know this is no game.
We know this is a disease.
We know this may destroy us.
We know we must at least TRY.

IN THE END WE WILL EITHER BEAT THE DEPRESSION OR IT WILL BEAT US. THIS IS NOT A PATH WE WANTED, CHOOSE OR DESIRED. WE WOULD LIKE TO A PART OF THE SO-CALLED NORMAL WORLD. PLEASE UNDERSTAND SOME HARD FACTS. WE CAN NOT JUST GET OVER IT. WE ARE NOT SEEKING ATTENTION BY OUR DEPRESSION. DEPRESSION IS NOT JUST HAVING THE BLUES, FEELING SAD OR DOWN IN THE DUMPS. THERE ARE TIMES DEPRESSION CAN & DOES MAKE US PHYSICALLY ILL. IT IS HARD TO FIGHT EVERY DAY AN OPPONENT THAT IS STILL A MYSTERY TO MANY. IT IS EXTREMELY HARD TO KNOW YOU DAILY DISAPPOINT OTHERS ~~ PEOPLE YOU LOVE, CO-WORKERS, PEOPLE WHO DEPEND ON YOU. THERE ARE DAILY REMINDERS OF HOW YOU FAIL. WE SUFFER EACH DAY TO ONE DEGREE OR ANOTHER. BUT WE ARE STILL PEOPLE WHO HAVE FEELINGS, HOPES, DREAMS , CONCERNS, DESIRES, LOVES, WISHES, DOUBTS, JOYS, TERRORS, REGRETS, LONGINGS, NEEDS ~~ ALL THE THINGS EVERYONE HAS.

ONE THING MORE ~~~ WE ARE PEOPLE WHO ARE IN VARIOUS DEGREES OF MASTERING THE FINE ART OF TRYING.
:- just me ~~ kjl1951
This dedicated to all people who suffer bravely each day with depression & all my friends at daily Strength.
Kathy Love