Roseannefan

stressed but proud....

Posted on 07/27/09, 12:47 pm

well, I'm totally proud of myself... the past 2 going on 3 weeks have been a challenge that I've been able to overcome. Relatively at least. Over 2 weeks ago now, my house was hit by a flash flood and pretty much destroyed. In less than 30 min, my house had standing water about 3 inches above my ankles (that's while I was walking on platform flipflops too!) So we threw whatever could be salvaged above the water area, later to be POD'ed up & the rest had to thrown out. My house is no longer liveable in; and the first week I was allowed to live with my future in-laws. Since then I've been sleeping on one of those futon couches in the living room at my dad's house... my fiance's mom threw a hissy fit & said I was only allowed to live with them a week!! That was a devastating blow, on top of the devastating blow of a ruined house, being told that I was just faking, using any excuse to stay with them... if it were up to her, I wouldn't have even stayed that first night! That royally pissed me off beyond belief! But even considering this hell for the past 2 weeks, it only once came across my mind to hurt myself, over a moronic fight with my parents. I've been wanting to sleep like crazy, and wanting to cry all the time too. But honestly, aside from that one slip up, I've never had the urge to si!

So, if it seems that I'm not on a lot lately, that's why... just all the chaos & stress & lack of privacy!

• Reply #1 07/29/09  3:54pm
  
  Tryingstill
  Wow, thats a lot to deal with! I'm sorry to hear about your house and your soon-to-be-mother-in-law's lack of support and understanding.
  
  But WELL DONE for not cracking under the pressure. You should be very proud of yourself. You have proved to yourself that you have the strength and determination to cope with really stressful situations without turning to the blade. Try to remember this feeling when difficulties arise in the future.
  
  I am very proud of you. I hope you manage to get your living arrangements sorted out soon.
  
  Take care
• Reply #2 07/30/09  2:06pm
  
  TheThingsTh...
  Wow Roseanne! You have done an amazing job of coping!
  I really admire your ability to get through such stressful situations SI free. You have every right to be proud of yourself :)
  Best wishes getting your home back in order...I'll be thinking of you and hoping everything works out smoothly.
  Lucy
• Reply #3 08/05/09  9:06am
  
  Roseannefan
  thanks to you both for your words of support. it has been quite a lot of pressure throughout all of this... the house being destroyed, the living situation... and then last week, I had a couple seizures within a 2 hour period, and since then, both parents have been really watching me like a hawk, "are you SURE you're okay?" every moan/mumble/sigh I make... so that's getting on my nerves. yes, they're trying to protect me and be compassionate, but still.
  
  my house is nowhere near being done, hell, it's nowhere even really being started! but as my fiance says, at least I've got a roof over my head and a place to sleep in the meantime. my real worry is how expensive it is to rebuild a house! I don't see how people can do it year after year in all those states that seem to flood every year! I tell you, I don't think I could do it more than once or twice at the absolute most!
  
  but, no, I still haven't had any urges to si... cry, scream or yell, yes... totally give up, yes... but si, no! I just hope as you say, tryingstill, that I do remember how I've been able to cope throughout this & not turn again to the blade at a later date. I tell you, honestly, this site (when I can get on it), reading books (I've become quite attached to the "Twilight" series - since July I've read first 3 books & on last one now!) and watching Roseanne reruns has greatly helped me!!
• Reply #4 08/06/09  11:03am
  
  ChaoticCont...
  That is so good too hear very proud of you..Hard to stay grounded when things are out of control around us.Shows how strong you are and alot of courage

This group is for adults dealing with self injury issues beyond their teen years. I find it sometimes awkward discussing trggering details with those not of adult age. Please don't misunderstand, I think people of all ages have valuable opinions, it's just no one in my life ever showed appropriate boundaries with me and I don't want to make that mistake with others.