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Celebrate the fact that you aren't perfect and that you will never be. Just enjoy being you!!!!

  • Stressed?

    Posted by cinaflower - 06/18/08, 11:43 am

    10 Tips to Deal with StressBy Kathy ThompsonToo much pressure, too much to do, to little time? Are the walls closing in on you?Your deadline is coming...

  • a good website

    Posted by cinaflower - 04/28/08, 07:40 pm

    There's a great website for relaxation and meditation. It's so peaceful and lovely and fun to play with. It's www.myinnerworld.com

  • get happy

    Posted by cinaflower - 04/25/08, 05:39 pm

      Print This Page Close Window 20 Simple Ways to Get HappyTake control of your mood and improve your health.From Cut Your CholesterolState of Mi...

  • self esteem

    Posted by cinaflower - 04/24/08, 11:01 pm

    Self-Esteem Uzma Mazhar Self-esteem means a sense of self; the value one puts on self, and the worth one attaches to self.  Self-esteem is t...

Group News

tips for happiness

Posted by cinaflower - 10/25/08, 03:02 pm

Tips for Happiness in Daily Lifeby Remez Sasson

Daily life can be made happier. It is a matter of choice. It is our attitude that makes us feel happy or unhappy. It is true, we meet all kinds of situations during the day, and some of them may not be conductive to happiness. We can choose to keep thinking about the unhappy events, and we can choose to refuse to think about them, and instead, relish the happy moments. All of us constantly go through various situations and circumstances, but we do not have to let them influence our reactions and feelings.

If we let outer events influence our moods, we become their slaves. We lose our freedom. We let our happiness be determined by outer forces. On the other hand, we can free ourselves from outer influences. We can choose to be happy, and we can do a lot to add happiness to our lives.

What is happiness? It is a feeling of inner peace and satisfaction. It is usually experienced when there are no worries, fears or obsessing thoughts, and this usually happens, when we do something we love to do or when we get, win, gain or achieve something that we value. It seems to be the outcome of positive events, but it actually comes from the inside, triggered by outer events.

For most people happiness seems fleeting, because they let changing outer circumstances affect it. One of the best ways to keep it, is by gaining inner peace through daily meditation. As the mind becomes more peaceful, it becomes easier to choose the happiness habit.

Here are a few tips for increasing happiness in daily life:

1) Endeavor to change the way you look at things. Always look at the bright side. The mind may drag you to think about negativity and difficulties. Don't let it. Look at the good and positive side of every situation.

2) Think of solutions, not problems.

3) Listen to relaxing, uplifting music.

4) Watch funny comedies that make you laugh.

5) Each day, devote some time to reading a few pages of an inspiring book or article.

6) Watch your thoughts. Whenever you catch yourself thinking negative thoughts, start thinking of pleasant things.

7) Always look at what you have done and not at what you haven't.

Sometimes you may begin the day with the desire to accomplish several objectives. At the end of the day you might feel frustrated and unhappy, because you haven't been able to do all of those things.

Look at what you have done, not at what you have not been able to do. You may have accomplished a lot during the day, and yet you let yourself become frustrated, because of some small things that you did not accomplish. You have spent all day successfully carrying out many plans, and instead of feeling happy and satisfied, you look at what was not accomplished and feel unhappy. It is unfair toward yourself.

8) Each day do something good for yourself. It can be something small, such buying a book, eating something you love, watching you favorite program on TV, going to a movie, or just having a stroll on the beach.

9) Each day do at least one act to make others happy. This can be a kind word, helping your colleagues, stopping your car at the crossroad to let people cross, giving your seat in a bus to someone else, or giving a small present to someone you love. The possibilities are infinite. When you make someone happy, you become happy, and then people try to make you happy.

10) Always expect happiness.

11) Do not envy people who are happy. On the contrary, be happy for their happiness.

12) Associate with happy people, and try to learn from them to be happy. Remember, happiness is contagious.

13) Do your best to stay detached, when things do not proceed as intended and desired. Detachment will help you stay calm and control your moods and reactions. Detachment is not indifference. It is the acceptance of the good and the bad and staying balanced. Detachment has much to do with inner peace, and inner peace is conductive to happiness.

14) Smile more often.

Are you perfectly unperfect?

Posted by cinaflower - 07/14/08, 12:02 pm

Please drop by often, unload, start a new topic, ask a question. Don't be shy!!!!!

Feeling BLAH?

Posted by cinaflower - 06/18/08, 02:53 pm

Get Happy!

Sometimes we get so busy and stressed, or depressed and in a funk that we don’t know how to get out of it. Sometimes we sit around thinking about what we could’ve said or done differently, we worry about what’s going to happen, or we obsess about a particular issue until we’re nearly insane! A long time ago I decided that when I was in a funk I would do what makes me happy, I let myself say no to others and I just have fun- and it ends up being fun for everyone because I’m not such a pain in the butt!

This is my list of pick me ups:

1. Exercise: Get up and do something. Go for a bike ride, hike a trail, go swim, put on some music and shake your booty, lift some weights, do some yoga, chase your kids around the yard. Exercise changes your brain chemistry and really helps with depression. It is a cure and a preventative of almost every illness there is. If you could put the best thing for your health in a bottle it’d be exercise! You look better, you’ll live longer, you’ll feel better. Just move more today than yesterday- it doesn’t have to be all or nothing, it’s not something you have to do perfectly, just MOVE!

2. Go outside: The vitamin D from the sun lifts your mood. Go for a walk around the neighborhood, shop a cute downtown, sit outside and read, go check out a nearby state park, make a picnic lunch and eat outside, play with a pet. Use all of your senses. Smell the breeze, listen to the bees buzz, watch leaves move, follow a butterfly intently- it will lower your heart rate and blood pressure!

3. Act like a kid: blow bubbles, make a sand castle or mud pies, get some friends together to play something- football or whatever, tickle someone, color a picture, eat watermelon with your face, put on a fake tatoo, put your hair in pigtails, eat dessert first, don’t do anything responsible all day, laugh and laugh, see how many funny faces or noises you can make.

4. Touch someone: hug, kiss, have sex with your partner or by yourself! Orgasms send good chemicals to your brain!. We need to be touched whether it’s sexual or not. Don’t be afraid to be sexy. If you have someone to have sex with- look up some new positions on the internet, send them a dirty email (uh, don’t get them fired though!) Make yourself hug people, give them a big smooch on the cheek, wrestle with the kids, don’t be afraid to be touchy feely!

5. Get in some water: take a long shower or bath, go swim in a pool or lake, go hike to a waterfall and stick your feet in, go to the beach, wash your car and get soaking wet, play with your kids with the hose, stand in the rain.

6. Make or buy a special meal or snack: don’t use food as a reward, or a way to soothe emotions- I know I struggle with this- but even with the confines of a diet you can find something luxurious to eat, to make yourself feel special- fresh veggies or fruit from a farmer’s market, smoked salmon with some low-fat cream cheese, a lovely salad in a fancy bowl, a piece of Godiva chocolate, an ice cream cone, a snow ball, some boiled shrimp, BBQ in your backyard with some friends, a Tootsie pop, some sushi. Don’t pig out, don’t eat in front of the tv or standing up or in your car- sit down, light a candle, pick a flower and put it in a vase, use good china, savor it slowly- be mindful.

7. Be creative: even if you don’t have an artistic bone in your body you CAN make something, finger paint, arrange a bouquet of flowers, make something out of clay, draw a picture of your family and put it on the fridge, send someone a homemade card, rearrange some nick nacks or furniture, draw with chalk on the concrete outside, decorate some cookies, arrange all your books on your shelves with like colors together, do your make-up and hair to perfection. Go to the local crafts store and buy some kind of kit- paint a t-shirt, make a bracelet, decorate a frame, buy some new markers. Go on the paint program on your computer and make something crazy and make it your screen saver.

8. Listen to music: I got an IPOD for Christmas and after feeling like a techno moron for months it has become my most treasured possession. I put on music when I’m driving, when I exercise, when I clean house, when I’m cooking. It also changes the brain chemistry. You need music in your life. If you think you don’t care, look some stuff up. Look on the MTV website and find the best music of the 90s or 80s or whatever- you’ve got to like something. Maybe you’d like meditative music, or jazz, or classical. Find out what you like, and get some! It without a doubt is an important part of my life. I prefer upbeat, fun music that makes me want to dance and it really makes me work more and exercise more ardently when I have it on. I also listen to some guided meditations that are lovely too.

9. Stay active and out of your mind: When I’m really getting crazy I know I have to stop thinking. I have to get up and get moving- I clean house, I organize things, I put on music and fold laundry, I paint a room, I pull weeds, I clean out my closet, I go shopping, I go eat with a friend, I cook, I stay occupied and active and it helps get my mind off of whatever is bothering me plus I end up feeling better about myself because I’m moving and productive. The thoughts don’t always go away entirely, but I get more peaceful and I get distracted, and I can listen to what I’m thinking so that sometimes I come up with an entirely new way of looking at things that makes more sense.

10. Get some sleep: take a nap, go to bed early, sleep late- whatever works- don’t feel guilty for sleeping but don’t overdo it either, then you’ll feel crappy. If you have trouble sleeping, try this a couple of hours before bedtime: take a long bath or shower, put on pajamas, dim the lights in the house, drink a cup of sleepy time tea or eat a small snack with a glass of milk, you can watch tv or read- although I’ve read that you shouldn’t watch tv because it makes your mind too active- but tv in bed makes me really sleepy. During the day just make sure it’s cool and dark in the room and turn off your phones. You deserve some sleep!

11. P.S. - say NO when you want to say no! If you aren’t feeling good inside or out, it’s not helping anyone, so don’t feel like you’re being selfish when you take care of yourself first. My kids are bored right now because it’s summer but I just was away for days and it’s okay to say you’re too busy to talk, or to have a kid over, or that you don’t feel like taking them somewhere. It’s okay to not want to go to your Mom’s house 2 hours away because you want to regroup. It’s okay to tell someone you can’t pick up their kid, it’s okay to ask everyone to have a few days of uncomplicated uninterrupted peace . It’s your life, you can do whatever you want with it. Your aren’t responsible for everyone’s feelings, you don’t have to be everything to everyone all the time!!!! Just let go for a day or so and just have fun!

by cinaflower

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