Three statisticians go deer hunting with bows and arrows. They spot a big buck and take aim. One shoots, and his arrow flies off 10 feet to the left. The second shoots, and his arrow goes 10 feet to the right. The third statistician jumps up and down, yelling, "We got him, we got him!"

Three men were sitting on a park bench. The one in the middle was reading a newspaper; the others were pretending to fish. They baited imaginary hooks, cast lines, and reeled in their catch. A passing policeman stopped to watch the spectacle, and asked the man in the middle if he knew the other two. "Oh, yes," he said. "They're my friends." "In that case, warned the officer, "you'd better get them out of here." "Yes, sir," the man replied, and he began rowing furiously.

First Hunter: Where are you?
Second Hunter: Right over here.
First Hunter: Are you alright?
Second Hunter: I'm fine.
First Hunter: Then I've shot a deer!

GOOOOD ONES!

Well ya`ll sit back and listen to this little tail of me and my friend Jim..We were on the way to work one day and the damnest thing past our way ..We locked the truck down in and intersection to double take this ..A hunter had a deer a real f*cken deer in a seatbelt in front of the cab of his truck..Ever hear deer in the dash board look is our saying around here liveing on top of a mountain..By the way we were sober as judges..

A fisherman returned to shore with a giant marlin that was bigger and heavier than he. On the way to the cleaning shed, he ran into a second fisherman who had a stringer with a dozen baby minnows. The second fisherman looked at the marlin, turned to the first fisherman, and said, "Only caught one, eh?"

Well the blonde went fishing and at the end of her line was a big magnet. What do you expect to catch with that someone asks? Oh, she said I'm fishing for Steelhead. xo

Good thing she wasn't fishing for catfish!

yeh--cats do NOT like water! Wonder if whe caught anything?

A fisherman accidentally dropped his wallet into the water, and was amazed to see a school of carp deftly balancing the wallet on their noses and tossing it from one fish to another. "Gee," exclaimed the fisherman, "That's the first time I've ever seen carp to carp walleting."
(wall-to-wall carpeting)

"I've hunted lions and tigers with a rifle," said hunter number one.
"Ive hunted lions and tigers with a bow and arrow," said hunter number two.
"I've hunted lions and tigers with a club," said hunter number three.
"Good heavens!" exclaimed the other two. "Weren't you scared?"
"Not at all," replied hunter number three. "There are fifty members in my club!"

Net Income: The money a fisherman earns.

Gabrador, Dzinfizz, and Jeanne36Roses, thanks to each of you for contributing to 'Hunting and Fishing Humor'.

Sitting still and wishing
Made no person great;
The good Lord sends the fishing,
But you must dig the bait.

-Author Unknown

Melvin: Are you fishin'?
Alvin: Nope, jus' drownin' worms.