I found this devotional teaching by Oswald Chamber so compelling this morning. I am learning to really press in Him in the midst of my sorrow and pain. I need to trust Him with my grand daughter. I need to trust Him with my three estranged children. I need to trust Him with my broken dreams. I need to be willing to "let go of the reins" and let Him drive. I need to understand that His plan for my children is being worked out, and it doesn't involve me right now. I need to trust Him that it's okay for it not to involve me right now. Can I trust the Lord with my heart? With my dreams? With my hopes? Yes!


Self-Awareness vs. Christ Awareness

"God intends for us to live a well-rounded life in Christ, but there are times when that life is attached from the outside. Then we tend to fall back into self-examination, a habit that we thought was gone. Self-awareness is the first thing that will upset the completeness of our life in God, and self-awareness continually produces a sense of struggling and turmoil in our lives."

MY NOTES: I think, as estranged parents, we are very much self-aware, and struggling, and in turmoil.

"Self-awareness is not sin, and it can be produced by nervous emotions or by suddenly being dropped into a totally new set of circumstances. Yet is is NEVER God's will that we should be anything less than absolutely complete in Him. Anything that disturbs our rest in him must be rectified at once, and it is not rectified by being ignored but only by coming to Jesus. If we will come to Him, asking Him to product Christ-awareness in us, He will always do it, until we fully learn to abide in Him."

"Never allow anything that divides or destroys the oneness of your life with Christ to remain in your life without facing it. Beware of allowing the influence of your fiends or your circumstances to divide your life... The intellectual, moral, and spiritual depth of our reality as a person is tested and measured by these words. Yet in every detail of our lives where we are found not to be real, we would rather dispute the findings than come to Jesus."

"Whenever anything begins to disintegrate your life with Jesus, turn to Him at once, asking Him to re-establish your rest. Never allow anything to remain in your life that is causing the unrest. Think of every detail of your life that is causing the disintegration as something to fight against, not as something you should allow to remain. Ask the Lord to put awareness of Himself in you, and your self-awareness will disappear. Then He will be your all in all."

"Beware of allowing your self-awareness to continue, because slowly but surely it will awaken self-pity, and self-pity is satanic. Don't allow yourself to say, "Well, They have just misunderstood me, and this is something over which they should be apologizing to me." Learn to leave other alone regarding this. Simply ask the Lord to give you Christ-awareness, and He will steady you until your completeness in Him is absolute."

I want to finish the race, and to finish it well. I want to hear a "well done" from my Lord. If I'm self-aware, I won't be Christ-aware. We need to focus on the prize - Jesus - the author and perfecter of our faith!