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1. Be aware of your thoughts. Keep a journal and write down all your negative thoughts. You cannot change the way you think unless you understand how you think and talk to yourself about situations.

2. Once you have identified your negative thoughts and patterns of thinking then you can develop positive statements to substitute for the negative ones.

Example:

Negative statement – I am so dumb, I always forget something.

Positive statement – Forgetting things are normal, I just need to write a list to help me remember things. I can love myself even though I forget once in a while.

3. Using the journal can help, but better yet; Evaluate how you feel. If you are changing to a positive pattern of thinking you will worry and catastrophize less, which contributes to a sense of well-being.

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Managing depression means total self-care.  If you neglect to take care of yourself once you begin to feel better, you will likely begin to re-experience some symptoms of depression.  Emotional health, as well as physical health, is about lifestyle.

1.       Structure your day to include the factors or interventions of taking care of yourself.  This can be easily established by using a daily activity chart until you are able to consistently engage in self-care without constant reminders.

2.      Support yourself by developing and utilizing resources to eliminate social isolation and withdrawal.

3.      Choosing positive thoughts instead of negative ones, reminding yourself that depression is a temporary emotional state, and focusing on taking one day at a time.

4.      Be aware of what works and is beneficial and what does not help you.  Keeping a journal can be useful for self-monitoring.  You will want to identify the ‘red flags’ of potential regression and any patterns of behavior which affect you negatively.

5.      Exercise can be very beneficial and helpful in reducing body tension, improving sleep, creating a sense of well-being, increasing energy, and decreasing stress. However, before initiating any exercise program, check with your physician.

6.      Eat daily, well-balanced meals for good nutrition.  If you are unsure of what it means to eat healthy, consult your physician, dietitian, go to a bookstore or the internet where you will find many resources.  People who are depressed often experience some disturbance in a normal healthy eating pattern, and as a result, there can be weight loss or weight gain.

7.      Clarify what your values are and do an inventory.  If you are not living in accordance with your value system, this could be contributing to your experience of depression.

This was taken from a handout given to me from a therapist. 

Page 222, 3.  Skill-Building Resources for Increasing Social Competency

A.     Skills in asking for what you need or want:

1.       Describe the current situation

2.      Express your feelings and opinions

3.      Assert yourself by asking what you want or saying no

4.      Reinforce or reward the person ahead of time by explaining consequences

5.      Stay mindful by keeping focus on your objectives

6.      Appear confident and effective

7.      Negotiate and be willing to give to get

B.     Skills in your relationships:

1.       Be courteous and gentle

2.      Act interested in the other person by listening to what they say and how they act

3.      Validate by acknowledging his or her feelings, wants, and difficulties

4.      Use a little humor when needed

C.     Skills for self-respect

1.       Be fair to yourself and others

2.      Do not apologies for being alive

3.      Stick to your values

4.      Be truthful

5.      Do not act helpless

6.      Do not exaggerate

D.    Skills for positive emotions

1.       Treat your physical illnesses

2.      Eat right

3.      Do not take mood altering drugs

4.      Get enough sleep

5.      Keep a positive mind by thinking positive

6.      Keep or make positive friends and be a positive friend

7.      Build positive experiences

E.     Skills for distraction against negativity

1.       Do activities you enjoy

2.      Contribute to something or someone

3.      Compare yourself to those less fortunate

4.      Read emotional books, watch emotional movies etc.

5.      Push negative situations away by leaving it for later (containment)

6.      Count to 10, count colors, work, watch TV, do puzzles, word games etc.

7.      Hold ice in your hand, squeeze a rubber ball very hard etc.

F.     Skills for self-soothing by using your 5 senses

1.       Vision – flowers, beautiful art, nature, etc.

2.      Sound – soothing music, sounds of nature, etc.

3.      Touch – stress ball, textures, fingers through your hair, pet an animal etc.

4.      Taste – gum or hard candy

5.      Smell – fragrance, perfume, lotions, etc.

G.    Skills for improving the moment

1.       Imagine scenes that are relaxing

2.      Find or create some purpose, value, or meaning in your life

3.      Pray and open your heart to God

4.      Try muscle relaxing by tensing and relaxing each large muscle group

5.      Focus your entire attention on just what you are doing at the moment

6.      Take a brief vacation by taking a short nap, unplugging your phone, etc

7.      Encourage yourself by repeating positive affirmations

H.    Skill of pros and cons

1.       Make a list of pros and cons tolerating the distress than make another list of pros and cons of ‘not’ tolerating the distress. For example, ‘should I harm myself?’

I.       Skill of acceptance

1.       Free yourself from suffering requires acceptance from deep within of what is.  Let yourself go completely with what is by letting go of fighting reality.

2.      Respond to negative emotions with good rational responses by turning negative thoughts into positive thoughts.