caffiend115

PTSD

Posted on 03/17/09, 12:53 am

My dad died of cancer when I was 15. He died at home and I can't seem to shake the memories. My mom screaming, me running to his side, calling out to him and him squeezing my hand and letting go the same time he breathed his last breath. I remember the touch of his skin, the texture of his blanket, the exact pitch of my mother's screams and a whole lot more. I relive that day every single time I have a minute to spare. I go to therapy and was diagnosed with PTSD and I'm on medications that aren't helping as much as they used to.

Can anyone help with the flashbacks and the anxiety...or just any of it?

• Reply #1 03/17/09  9:09pm
  
  HeavyHearte...
  You have been through alot girlie and I find myself being proud of you and I don't even know you yet. It takes a great deal of insight for a young woman your age to know it will be helpful to see a therapist. There are adult women who haven't even figured that out yet. I also want to encourage you to see about changing your "at home" therapist. If she isn't working for you then get another one, whether you have 3 months left or not. Therapist's are like gloves, you might have to try a few before you find the perfect fit. Your going through a hard time right now, the PTSD, the PE, depression, the Zolft not helping as much as it used to. The good news for you is its ALL only temporary. Your on the correct path, just be patient with yourself, it all takes time. I'm glad you found this site, there are alot of great women here who've all experienced the loss of there Dad. I'm here alot if you need to chat. Hugs, Marge
• Reply #2 03/28/09  11:16am
  
  kelseyo
  I know what you mean. My dad died when I was 10 and I remember coming home from a walk that we had all except for him been on, coming into his bedroom to show him a rock I had found, and seeing him lying on the floor in his underwear and a tshirt. He was trying to change into something acceptable for the hospital. He told me to get my mom and his speech was slurred so I thought he was playing a practical joke..things like that never leave you no matter ho long it has been. It's been more than 7 years since that day and I still find myself thinking about it constantly and all of the things I could have done better in the situation or the fact that he couldn't walk and he drug himself from the basement to his room..things like that are always there. I don't see a therapist, but I agree with Marge, you should go to somone that helps you more. I'm sorry I couldn't help more. Message me whenever you want.
• Reply #3 04/10/09  3:51am
  
  iheartmzb
  ptsd is a bite the only thing i can say is a good therapist is invaluable you must not give up until you find the right fit.

daughters who have lost their fathers