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My father died October 7, 2008 and this year is particularly hard because every holiday and festival and landmark we think *Last year Daddy was here.* We attended a memorial service at the Veterans Cemetery where Daddy is buried, on Memorial Day, and a watchfire (where they burn with honour old and battered American flags) and I made a contribution to an abused childrens foundation (Daddy grew up in a less than stellar family, and worked hard all his life to give us the one thing he never had: happy memories of our father.) and to the hospice that cared for him so lovingly and cares for others regardless of their ability to pay.

I miss my Daddy every day and I say to those men who are out scattering their seed broadcast across the world with no thought of the children who spring up -- leaving them to be *fathered* by Uncle Sam and his neighobours, i say that you are missing out on the greatest adventure of your life.

God and Daddy were always friends, and I know he is happy now, but we miss him very much.

P.S. Its rather sad that 90% of the people boo-hooing in the streets over Michael Jackson, a total stranger to them who never would have given them the time of day, will walk right past the next door neighbour whose father died last week, too, and whom they have walked past and ignored for the last 50 years. Think about that.

My dad passed when I as nineteen. I was too absorbed im my own life to appreciate him. I love him more now than before and regret much. I am blessed my sons father has been there and stayed since day one when so many haven't. Ths made me think of my husband and I made his favorite dinner. I know it over but, Happy belated Fathers Day to all Good dads.

I posted my tribute to my father on poetsenvy.wordpress.com I appreciated your tribute.
everydayisagoodday

Very cute. Has anyone ever done a cost benefit analysis?

Being a dad is the price that a man has to pay for being born with two heads and only one brain.

although my fathers are in heavin.both my step. as well as my real.every year on fathers day i send a baloon up with a card attached just,if for no other reason.just to remind me that even though they aren't here on earth.they are still very much here,with every breath i take.and every step i take and every tear i cry or every time i laugh as some childhood memory...and for me.this keep's them very much alive.

"And this is for the father who no longer is with us but his guidance and teachings are felt each and every day." Thanks so much for that line Dr. J. My dearest dad will have been gone 21 years in July, but there are things that he did for me a taught me that I'll never forget: He, with my mom's help, taught me to read and to love reading. He taught me respect for others, even if you don't like them. He taught me that it's good to work hard.

He was a wonderful, loving dad who died far too soon. I would have been a very different person but for his guidance. I'll always miss him and wish he could have seen me as an adult.

Thank you for this. My father passed last Fall. I have no children of my own, so I was surprised when you admitted that even though you have your own three children, that ten years after your father has passed, YOU still feel like this day is for HIM (at least before you turn your attention to spending it with your children).

It surprised me but I find great comfort in hearing you admit this. I know I will always feel like Father's Day is for my Dad. I have been told countless times how much having children "changes everything." Of course it changes one's life deeply. But there are many things it does not change, at least not for everybody.

I have many friends now who never had their own children, and we all agree that most people with children make judgments about our lives without children and presume to know what we feel; something we wouldn't dream of doing with them. I have had people say to me: "If you had your own children, your father's illness/death would be easier for you." This sort of talk is presumptuous beyond all decency, and has always seemed to me like a lame attempt to isolate the child-free person in an attempt to reinforce their own feelings about being a parent.

Your honesty about your feelings for your Dad on Father's Day, ten years after his passing, breaks down these walls between people with children and people without children. I never set out to have children. So much freedom, and extra energy and time, comes with not having children that I was able follow my own personal calling, to use my gift to make the world a little better, which gave my father great satisfaction to see. He saw in my gift so much of himself.

Stop waking up every Father's Day with this conflict in your head. Go ahead and honor your own father, every Father's Day for the rest of your life. Look at his photograph when you wake up and remember all that he did for you, or say a few words of thanks to him silently, or tell your children some good stories about him. Just do whatever comes natural to you. Then go ahead and enjoy your own Father's Day; pass on the tradition, give your children their own memories of Father's Day, that in itself can be a way to continue to honor you father on this special day.

Dr J I love it!
ESF: notice my status change from yesterday, of course we acknowledge father's day...what is wrong with you?
Dr O.

AMEN, Dr. Jeremy. Many states proclaimed the week before Father's Day as Men's Health Week.......but the state public health offices didn't lift a finger to acknowledge it.

By the way.....your female-centric colleagues here on daily strength didn't acknowledge Father's Day either.....big surprise!

How sweet. I had a Dad like that who passed away 4 years ago and I'm not exaggerating when I say he was the greatest man I ever knew. Raised 6 kids and at his funeral we all argued about who was his favorite because we all felt his powerful unconditional love. We weren't spoiled by any means, but most definitely loved. What a gift. I'm sorry for you, ALC67 that you didn't have that, but don't turn bitter toward all men because of it. There are some gems out there and Father's Day is a wonderful time to salute them.

There are fathers like that? Mine wasn't.
My dad and I didn't speak to eachother the last 6 months of his life. I'd been going through a rough patch in my life and I told him about it and his response was 'If you don't like your life, then go kill yourself.'. 'Nuff said.

very sweet journal entry and Happy Fathers Day to you!