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		<title>Physical &amp; Emotional Abuse Forum: No, you're the ass - DailyStrength</title>
		<description>I have to remember that I can NOT talk to this person. I don't know the man I married. I don't think he knows himself either. 

Doesn't ma...</description>
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			<title>Comment by Learned</title>
			<link>http://www.dailystrength.org/c/Physical_Emotional_Abuse/forum/14750100-no-youre-ass/lastpage</link>
			<description><![CDATA[I really do understand what you mean when you say hide the hurt and don't let them see you cry because you don't want to give them the satisfaction that they have gotten to you.  
 But here's the thing you shouldn't even have to feel the hurt in the first place because love is not about being hurt.  ...]]></description>
			<pubDate>Tue, 07 Aug 2012 16:17:47 +0100</pubDate>
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			<title>Comment by Look4Serenity</title>
			<link>http://www.dailystrength.org/c/Physical_Emotional_Abuse/forum/14750100-no-youre-ass/lastpage</link>
			<description><![CDATA[Hi LoveStone, 
  
 If it helps at all, I could have written that. You are not alone. At least now we are aware that we are married to a$$es. 
  
 My H was actually a <a href="http://www.dailystrength.org/treatments/Walking" onclick="treatmentHotLink('http://www.dailystrength.org/treatments/Walking')" class="treatmentlink" title="Learn more about Walking">walking</a> red flag before we were married. I console myself by saying that I was just not in the correct "self esteem head space" to admit w...]]></description>
			<pubDate>Tue, 07 Aug 2012 16:27:52 +0100</pubDate>
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			<title>Comment by Littlekatya</title>
			<link>http://www.dailystrength.org/c/Physical_Emotional_Abuse/forum/14750100-no-youre-ass/lastpage</link>
			<description><![CDATA[I also thought Manny was like fruit from Heaven (not the one in Eden that damns you to suffering--LOL). 
  
 But I could have noticed some little things too.  And really--the eggs. I can remember a lot of times when I was thinking, "saying thank you would be appropriate." 
  
 But, of course, no it woul...]]></description>
			<pubDate>Tue, 07 Aug 2012 18:11:13 +0100</pubDate>
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			<title>Comment by Littlekatya</title>
			<link>http://www.dailystrength.org/c/Physical_Emotional_Abuse/forum/14750100-no-youre-ass/lastpage</link>
			<description><![CDATA[Oh--and my mantra isn't nearly as nice as yours and look4's. 
  
 Mine is "I HATE YOU! You asshole!" Not quite as nice, but it keeps me from wanting him back.]]></description>
			<pubDate>Tue, 07 Aug 2012 18:13:43 +0100</pubDate>
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			<title>Comment by MagieM</title>
			<link>http://www.dailystrength.org/c/Physical_Emotional_Abuse/forum/14750100-no-youre-ass/lastpage</link>
			<description><![CDATA[Best mantra ever Littlekatya....I think I will have to borrow that one lol 
  
 -Lovestone, it's funny how we somehow find ourselves in a position where we feel compelled to go to someone else for everything. (I'm not judging b/c I have the same struggles). But, I don't really think that we have 'cond...]]></description>
			<pubDate>Tue, 07 Aug 2012 18:40:50 +0100</pubDate>
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			<title>Comment by MagieM</title>
			<link>http://www.dailystrength.org/c/Physical_Emotional_Abuse/forum/14750100-no-youre-ass/lastpage</link>
			<description><![CDATA[Best mantra ever Littlekatya....I think I will have to borrow that one lol 
  
 -Lovestone, it's funny how we somehow find ourselves in a position where we feel compelled to go to someone else for everything. (I'm not judging b/c I have the same struggles). But, I don't really think that we have 'cond...]]></description>
			<pubDate>Tue, 07 Aug 2012 18:42:36 +0100</pubDate>
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			<title>Comment by MagieM</title>
			<link>http://www.dailystrength.org/c/Physical_Emotional_Abuse/forum/14750100-no-youre-ass/lastpage</link>
			<description><![CDATA[Best mantra ever Littlekatya....I think I will have to borrow that one lol 
  
 -Lovestone, it's funny how we somehow find ourselves in a position where we feel compelled to go to someone else for everything. (I'm not judging b/c I have the same struggles). But, I don't really think that we have 'cond...]]></description>
			<pubDate>Tue, 07 Aug 2012 18:45:16 +0100</pubDate>
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			<title>Comment by MagieM</title>
			<link>http://www.dailystrength.org/c/Physical_Emotional_Abuse/forum/14750100-no-youre-ass/lastpage</link>
			<description><![CDATA[Best mantra ever Littlekatya....I think I will have to borrow that one lol 
  
 -Lovestone, it's funny how we somehow find ourselves in a position where we feel compelled to go to someone else for everything. (I'm not judging b/c I have the same struggles). But, I don't really think that we have 'cond...]]></description>
			<pubDate>Tue, 07 Aug 2012 18:45:16 +0100</pubDate>
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			<title>Comment by MagieM</title>
			<link>http://www.dailystrength.org/c/Physical_Emotional_Abuse/forum/14750100-no-youre-ass/lastpage</link>
			<description><![CDATA[Best mantra ever Littlekatya....I think I will have to borrow that one lol 
  
 -Lovestone, it's funny how we somehow find ourselves in a position where we feel compelled to go to someone else for everything. (I'm not judging b/c I have the same struggles). But, I don't really think that we have 'cond...]]></description>
			<pubDate>Tue, 07 Aug 2012 18:45:17 +0100</pubDate>
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			<title>Comment by LoveStone</title>
			<link>http://www.dailystrength.org/c/Physical_Emotional_Abuse/forum/14750100-no-youre-ass/lastpage</link>
			<description><![CDATA[Thanks guys. It is more supportive than you know. He's sitting watching TV. The only reason it's pleasant in here is because after my "hysterical" behavior I apologized and took the blame.  
  
 I only need to buy a little time and I can <a href="http://www.dailystrength.org/treatments/Leave" onclick="treatmentHotLink('http://www.dailystrength.org/treatments/Leave')" class="treatmentlink" title="Learn more about Leave">leave</a>. If I use both of these amazing mantras and remember that ...]]></description>
			<pubDate>Tue, 07 Aug 2012 19:32:48 +0100</pubDate>
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			<title>Comment by Livndadrem</title>
			<link>http://www.dailystrength.org/c/Physical_Emotional_Abuse/forum/14750100-no-youre-ass/lastpage</link>
			<description><![CDATA[Yeah, we've all been there. 
  
 I am an intelligent, well-educated woman.  I look back on the time before with my ex before we were married and can't help but wonder WHAT the F*** was I THINKING?  Red flags?  Like L4S, my ex was just one <a href="http://www.dailystrength.org/treatments/Walking" onclick="treatmentHotLink('http://www.dailystrength.org/treatments/Walking')" class="treatmentlink" title="Learn more about Walking">walking</a> red flag, but I excused, ignored or minimised all of it...]]></description>
			<pubDate>Tue, 07 Aug 2012 20:38:57 +0100</pubDate>
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			<title>Comment by LoveStone</title>
			<link>http://www.dailystrength.org/c/Physical_Emotional_Abuse/forum/14750100-no-youre-ass/lastpage</link>
			<description><![CDATA[You guys are great. I just wanted to mention validation. I think this is what drives us bonkers. Do we assume we're gettting it through actions from our abusers. Do we think we are recognized through either bill paying or just by staying. Did we fool ourselves that that was them caring? 
  
  After I ...]]></description>
			<pubDate>Wed, 08 Aug 2012 09:59:18 +0100</pubDate>
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			<title>Comment by peggsu2</title>
			<link>http://www.dailystrength.org/c/Physical_Emotional_Abuse/forum/14750100-no-youre-ass/lastpage</link>
			<description><![CDATA[I'm coming to realize that I didn't really want to be with my ex to begin with!   Memories of my disdain for him and his past and how I really felt about the man are starting to come back to me.  I was dealing with a master manipulator. 
  
 I was amused by his presumptuous  behavior,  I didn't even q...]]></description>
			<pubDate>Wed, 08 Aug 2012 11:14:35 +0100</pubDate>
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			<title>Comment by Learned</title>
			<link>http://www.dailystrength.org/c/Physical_Emotional_Abuse/forum/14750100-no-youre-ass/lastpage</link>
			<description><![CDATA[Sorry if what I'm about to say sounds negative or lessens your enthusiasm about your conversations with your ex, but you did say he wasn't good to you. Was he abusive to you back then?  
 If so, don't put those blinders on. Just because he admits to his past behavior and admits to being destructive,d...]]></description>
			<pubDate>Wed, 08 Aug 2012 19:59:05 +0100</pubDate>
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			<title>Comment by Learned</title>
			<link>http://www.dailystrength.org/c/Physical_Emotional_Abuse/forum/14750100-no-youre-ass/lastpage</link>
			<description><![CDATA[And you said you "propped him up." Does that mean you financially supported him? if so find out if he's working a steady job and for how long as well as if he's in debt or not. If he isn't working steady and is in debt, he could just be looking for someone to help bail him out.  
 another thing to co...]]></description>
			<pubDate>Wed, 08 Aug 2012 20:11:00 +0100</pubDate>
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			<title>Comment by Learned</title>
			<link>http://www.dailystrength.org/c/Physical_Emotional_Abuse/forum/14750100-no-youre-ass/lastpage</link>
			<description><![CDATA["Do we assume we're gettting it through actions from our abusers." 
 I don't think so. I believe we think we are getting validation from them when they are in the honeymoon phase and tell us all of those sweet nothings, that are just bait and lies. They make promises they don't keep, act so sincere a...]]></description>
			<pubDate>Wed, 08 Aug 2012 20:37:19 +0100</pubDate>
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			<title>Comment by LoveStone</title>
			<link>http://www.dailystrength.org/c/Physical_Emotional_Abuse/forum/14750100-no-youre-ass/lastpage</link>
			<description><![CDATA[@learned, i think you misunderstood me. I referenced a conversation I had with my ex where he was able to validate my feelings. I should refer to him as just friend. We are not nor will we be in a relationship. I called him in the even I needed a place to stay if i moved back out of the state.  
  
 I...]]></description>
			<pubDate>Wed, 08 Aug 2012 22:01:30 +0100</pubDate>
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			<title>Comment by Mtnwoman</title>
			<link>http://www.dailystrength.org/c/Physical_Emotional_Abuse/forum/14750100-no-youre-ass/lastpage</link>
			<description><![CDATA[Love stone, I'm married to a narcissist too.  They are experts at manipulation and lying.  Their entire existence depends on it.  You said, "My husband always says that people don't know me that's why they're nice to me."  That is so typical of narcissists.  What he is doing is projecting.  Other pe...]]></description>
			<pubDate>Fri, 10 Aug 2012 20:18:52 +0100</pubDate>
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			<title>Comment by LoveStone</title>
			<link>http://www.dailystrength.org/c/Physical_Emotional_Abuse/forum/14750100-no-youre-ass/lastpage</link>
			<description><![CDATA[@mtnwomen,  
 SPOT.ON,]]></description>
			<pubDate>Sun, 12 Aug 2012 09:07:18 +0100</pubDate>
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			<title>Comment by Boneheaded</title>
			<link>http://www.dailystrength.org/c/Physical_Emotional_Abuse/forum/14750100-no-youre-ass/lastpage</link>
			<description><![CDATA[<a href="http://www.dailystrength.org/treatments/Reading" onclick="treatmentHotLink('http://www.dailystrength.org/treatments/Reading')" class="treatmentlink" title="Learn more about Reading">Reading</a> these posts and seeing my life written by someone else is so helpful to me. The kissing thing threw me backwards! My ex is a horrible kisser too! That's the first time I've come across that commonality. 
  
 I recently read a post on a PTSD forum that blasted those who label abusers/users/exs ...]]></description>
			<pubDate>Sun, 12 Aug 2012 13:37:59 +0100</pubDate>
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