Widows & Widowers Support Group

Just explain to them that you are not interested right now, thanks, but no thanks.

People were pushing me when my husband (we were not married at the time) got sick. They kept saying, you know, you are not married to him, you could walk away. Seriously, just because we were not married (it was my choice, he kept asking, I kept saying no), doesn't mean were were not married in the eyes of God and in a committed relationship. I am so thankful for every single second that we spent together...wish I had years and years more, but the time we were together, I knew and felt what real, deep, soulmate love is all about.

Will I ever find or want to find love again, who knows....but the point is...it's all in your time...and right now is not your time...explain that to your friends and family...

HUGS to you...

They just don't understand. It has not happened to them, so how can they? If you are like me, it makes you feel like you have to toss that one out the window and replace him.

Dating and remarrying is not for everyone. It is a personal choice and not one you are obligated to explain to anyone.

I am still trying to come up with a conversation stopper, but my back instantly rears up and I get pissed. As soon as I think of a good one, I'll share it with you.

"I'll let you know when I'm ready." might work, but if anyone has a better one liner let us know. Sharon.
Some people need to worry about their own life more, and let us take care of ours.

I agree with you on all counts. I still feel very married. After a little over a year. I have NO desire to date or be set up or anything like that. I haven't really had to tell anyone to back off. I've had a couple of mild offers, but nothing serious and it's easy to get out of. I honestly don't know if I'll ever have another relationship. I had a great one for many years and I don't want to go down that road with anyone else.
That said ... I don't know what a good response would be to someone trying to set you up. Honesty would probably be best. You had a long marriage that was good. Enough said!!!

thanks guys! it is soo nice to be able to talk with everyone that is dealing with the same issues....felt so lost for such a long time.

I love your last line and it really speaks for me also.
"When I go to bed at night.....my husband is all I think about".
It's been 2 yrs and 5 months and I still feel married to Bill. This is just a sad time in our marriage and that's okay.

I am still searching for the conversation stopper. Wish someone would share a good one.

Its hard to imagine finding someone else - period.

And finding another good guy (sorry good guys here) but.....I am sure the good guys probably feel the same.

When its time IF ITS EVER TIME I guess God has that plan...so they say