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Advice:
I dont know what to do before he deploys.
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I have been dating my boyfriend for a few years now and he is going to deploy in the next few weeks. For the past year he has been telling me he wants to get engaged before he leaves. It has not happened yet and there are no more chances for it to happen. We are currently in a long distance relationship since I am finishing school and he is stationed in another state. I will see him for 3 days over one weekend, but he is having oral surgery and basically I am only going there to take care of him. So I know I am not going to get a ring then and he has made it very clear that he hasnt bought one yet. I love him so much, but we have been fighting non stop lately and most of it has to do with being in long distance and then him leaving soon. My problem is a cannot go a year just being his girlfriend and move down there when i graduate if there is a chance he will come home and not want to be with me anymore. How can i make that commitment to move away from everyone I know to a place I know no one when he cannot commit to me :/ I told him I just wanted to be his friend if he didnt want to get engaged to me. I would still be there for him no matter what but i cannot give up everything when he isnt willing to commit to me :( what do I do? I love him but it isnt fair to me to wait either :/
Posted on 10/08/09, 06:10 pm
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Advice:
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Reply #1 - 10/13/09  2:00pm
" OMG that almost sounds like me and my dude! He's deployed right now and he's far away from me when he's not so he's been basically asking me to move up there and leave everything else behind...which i completely have a problem with. But i'm still thinking about it because i really love him and i dont have much to leave behind anyways. I really dont know what to say because basically we're in the same situation :S "
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Reply #2 - 10/13/09  2:17pm
" I guess it is nice to at least know there are other people going through the same thing! We at least had a huge conversation about it, because I would be leaving a really good job when he gets home. I guess right now I am leaning towards moving down there in the next year so we can be together. I love him enough so hopefully it will work out!! Good luck to you! How hard is the deployment on you? "
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Reply #3 - 10/14/09  4:18pm
" Maybe this sounds lame, but don't let a milestone determine if you are ready to be married. It is hard to let them go, but do the best you can while they are deployed. If your life takes another direction while he is gone, it does. If he wants you to wait for him, you will know it. If you're not sure, then you probably have your answer. "
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Reply #4 - 11/14/09  6:09pm
" I HEARTILY agree with Reply number three!!!! "

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