War & Terrorism Support Group

Since this spread out over four threads, I am posting this here:

The four threads are:
"So Quiet"
"Obama's Plan..."
"Obama mocking..."
and
"Saving our Community"

Okay, my apologies - but only for last night.

I came here and was reading the thread and I saw your comment, Junebug, about the reason people come here is out of boredom and because people call names and act obnoxious and to let off steam if you are upset about something - at least that's how I read it.

Okay, here's the quote:

Reply #8:
As much as some complain about name calling and obnoxious people...that's what keeps the posting active. No one likes to come to a site where everyone is nice and "friendly" and the same old same old goes on day in and day out. It gets BORING. We all hate being bored, that's why we come to sites like this. It gives us somewhere to let off steam and to keep up with current events. No one likes a site where everyone just agrees...PERIOD.

Well, I took exception to that. I didn't come to DS out of boredom - and I don’t know many who have. Most of the people here, at least to my knowledge, are people who are trying to deal with life issues and are here to give and get support.

And I came to the War and Terror community because I am very interested in politics and am concerned about my country. But I have always had problems with two things here in this community: 1) the name calling and such behavior, and 2) misinformation. And I have spoken out about those things many times in the past. And just because I disagree with what someone says is fact, that doesn't mean I am saying anything personal about person, but objecting to the alleged fact. And usually, I am very careful to try not to attack anyone at a personal level.

The way I deal with things, most often, is that instead of getting all riled up and saying something mean, I will use humor. Some people get this, others don't.

So last night when I read what was said about people being bored and coming to this community to let off steam - well that did upset me. And what I wrote was somewhat serious, but also what I thought was rather humorous. Maybe, maybe not. Humor doesn't always work.

But then Benice just jumped right in and she and I went back and forth quite a bit. And what I am saying here is that it was her just as much as it was me. Yes, I was swearing (which is quite unusual for me), and I was purposefully taking it over the top to try to make a point. But, I am quite sure I didn't take it nearly to the top as I have seen here many times.

But Benice doesn't see what she did and frequently does and has been doing since the day she came here. Whether Benice realizes it or not, some people - myself included - don't take all that kindly when people make a comment right after them that says one-liners like: Geeesh, or Paranoid? Once or twice is okay, but after a while it is like a mosquito.

And last night, Benice was what I term moralizing to me - which I find just as objectionable as I think Benice may find when someone curses.

Moralizing = things that one's parent would say to a child, etc. and thus implying that they are a child and don't know much. Statements such as: Geeesh, Chris, how old are you?

In essence, whether it is stated or not, that is a putdown just as much as calling someone an idiot.

So, I have tried to be very clear here. I am not trying to stop anyone from posting anything. This is our community - not just mine or yours. And everyone does have a right to post here. But people also have a right to say something when mis-information (or what they see as mis-information) is posted. And I will continue to say something about things that are not what I see as factual - but will try (as I usually do) to do so without attacking the person who posted it. And if I see that I hurt someone feelings, I will usually apologize if I see what I wrote was unwarranted.

Discussing politics can be hard because everyone has their views - and often people are passionate about their views. But my opinion is and always has been the personal attacks and name calling are uncalled for and do nothing to further rational discussion. And maybe last night was not the best way to try to make a point.

I hope that Benice now understands why I take issue with some of the things she posts here and since she was just as much a willing participant as I was, for everyone else, here's my apology for last night for going over the top. I really thought everyone would get it when I posted the "Save our Community" thread - but then I guess some didn't.

What often happens with something like this is most all of us feel we need to come back and answer what the last person wrote. I know I do. I feel I have to defend myself from what I see as accusations and/or misunderstandings of what I wrote. But I hope this clears this up and I really think I am done now! (:
Posted on 04/03/09, 05:04 pm