Trichotillomania (Hair Pulling) Support Group
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Hi. I don't mean to be mean or even discouraging to those who find Dr. Penzel and his work helpful. I really enjoyed his work at one point and even considered him a pioneer in the world of TTM awareness.
As I read his book, "The Hair Pulling Problem," I was really enthusiastic and even contacted him to thank him....and then I got to page 51 of his book. Everything changed for me. I respect him for all of the research he as done concerning TTM but I find his approach on certain topics counterproductive and highly discouraging to those who SUFFER from Trichotillomania and all of the emotional damage it provides.
The following excerpts is from his book, "The Hair-Pulling Problem" :
"You need to accept that TTM will not simply go away by itself. You will not wake up one morning and find that it has gone. While some people have experienced remissions, it would not be a good idea to count on this happening for you. If you believe that this is unfair, or the fact that you have it at all is unfair, I would advise you to reconsider. It is not unfair that you have it. We cannot say that life is fair or unfair. The world has not been set up according to a set of rules for us that we can point to and say they were not being followed. It simply is what it is." (51)
I think this is the most deplorable thing anyone, especially a doctor, can say to someone who is suffering from not just TTM, but any condition or illness.
I KNOW that I can't change my genetic makeup. He didn't have to explain that to me. But one thing I CAN change (with a lot of hard work and persistence) is my behavior. I absolutely disagree with his statement that remissions aren't possible for all TTM sufferers. I've been there. I stopped pulling for a very long time. I think this statement is irresponsible and counterproductive, offering very little or no hope for those who feel the shroud of darkness enveloping their very essences.
If Dr. Penzel had any type of impulse control disorder, he would know just how much reading this statement could discourage someone who suffers from one.
Suffice it to say, I have not read past page 51.
I reiterate, this is only my opinion and I don't mean to discourage anyone from finding comfort in Dr. Penzel's words.
As I read his book, "The Hair Pulling Problem," I was really enthusiastic and even contacted him to thank him....and then I got to page 51 of his book. Everything changed for me. I respect him for all of the research he as done concerning TTM but I find his approach on certain topics counterproductive and highly discouraging to those who SUFFER from Trichotillomania and all of the emotional damage it provides.
The following excerpts is from his book, "The Hair-Pulling Problem" :
"You need to accept that TTM will not simply go away by itself. You will not wake up one morning and find that it has gone. While some people have experienced remissions, it would not be a good idea to count on this happening for you. If you believe that this is unfair, or the fact that you have it at all is unfair, I would advise you to reconsider. It is not unfair that you have it. We cannot say that life is fair or unfair. The world has not been set up according to a set of rules for us that we can point to and say they were not being followed. It simply is what it is." (51)
I think this is the most deplorable thing anyone, especially a doctor, can say to someone who is suffering from not just TTM, but any condition or illness.
I KNOW that I can't change my genetic makeup. He didn't have to explain that to me. But one thing I CAN change (with a lot of hard work and persistence) is my behavior. I absolutely disagree with his statement that remissions aren't possible for all TTM sufferers. I've been there. I stopped pulling for a very long time. I think this statement is irresponsible and counterproductive, offering very little or no hope for those who feel the shroud of darkness enveloping their very essences.
If Dr. Penzel had any type of impulse control disorder, he would know just how much reading this statement could discourage someone who suffers from one.
Suffice it to say, I have not read past page 51.
I reiterate, this is only my opinion and I don't mean to discourage anyone from finding comfort in Dr. Penzel's words.
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My 6mo twin DD's are EBF and just started rice cereal on the first. Everything has been going fine except this morning one of them had a diaper rash (lots of redness around her anus). I read this as one of the signs of an allergy. BUT I did just buy a different brand diaper yesterday (which they have used randomly before w/no issues). Do you think its the cereal or the diaper? Im ready to start...
"i try to be reconciled with this problem, because i believe it is NOT a matter of will-power. i believe there is something bio-chemical that may or may not relate to stress and boredom. and i believe that one day there will be a solution. who knows how long that will take, tho!"
when i read the paragraph quoted from his book, i see it in 2 ways. in one reading, he's being pragmatic, speaking from his experience working with trichsters. in a different reading, he sounds cold and harsh.
i'm one of those who stopped pulling for years, but i have absolutely no idea how or why. my personality is non-competitive to the point that i "cheat" at solitaire, lol. so pull-free challenges are counterproductive for me, because the "challenge" part stresses me out! but i always wish the best for anyone else doing them.
reconciliation helped a great deal with my feelings of negativity around this disorder. i certainly have moments of despair, of feeling ugly, of hating trich. but those feelings are much less overwhelming than they used to be - before the day i looked at myself and thought... "you pull out your hair, and it sucks. but you don't have x, y, z... which would suck even worse."
since then, i've dealt with a few things that were (to me) bigger than trich - including a few weeks where my doctor told me i probably had melanoma (it turned out i didn't). perspective is huge... but that said, i'd never expect someone to share mine. i don't know what dr. penzel's perspective is (if he has trich?) but i wonder if he might reconsider his wording here to sound less harsh.
I think Trich is a biological, genetic disorder. My dad is 85 and suffers from it terribly. I have had it for almost 30 years. My oldest son is now 10 and I watch him like a hawk to see if he's starting to develop it.
I feel like it's a demon that can't be slayed. It's scary.
i feel like there are things i can do/avoid that will help manage it even tho we don't have a cure yet.
Would he say that to someone with Multiple Sclerosis? Or how about someone with cancer? This is a life-affecting condition just like any other serious disease.
As pessimistic as I am and as depressed as I am, I STILL have to hope that I can have a remission. My symptoms have remitted. And they will again.
Actually, I must thank Dr. Penzel. Ever since I read his callous statements, I haven't wanted to pull my hair as much--just to prove him wrong! :)