Teen Sexuality Support Group

My daughter began sexting with a boy who was several years older than her...she was 13-14 and he was 16-17. At the time I (and her mother) were freaked out by it, but it is usually just a part of growing up, although it is now the digital age of easy and instant communications. The darker side of the sexting is that the boy lived a thousand miles away and my daughter became infatuated with him. The boy had several girlfriends but my daughter insisted that he was being true to her, and when the realization finally hit her she was upset and depressed.
Sex, like everything else, is a learned experience and nobody, especially teenagers, likes to admit they don't know something. Sexting can be a simple way to learn about sex/pre sex, it is just new to the times due to instant messaging etc. I played spin the bottle along with the other local girls and guys and it was all fairly innocent. Unless it is abusive, it is a way to learn some of the sexual do's/don'ts regarding the opposite sex. Its an awkward time full of confusion.
Like anything learned early in life, sexting can also cause some psychological issues if it gets out of hand or abusive. Sexting outside of one's age group, especially with older men, isn't usually a good thing. Kids want to grow up, adults want to be kids again, but they shouldn't really mix since an older person's thoughts of sexting are often much different than a young teenager's ideas of what is actually being said. Sexting won't be going away but it is important to stay on top of the situation and offer advice and parental wisdom when warranted. Sexual predators should be turned in, but sexting between same age teenagers is not uncommon. Stay on top of it and use your parental instincts...sexting is probably a better way to learn about the opposite sex than watching porn. Keeping an open communication with your child is paramount just to make sure that the other person isn't some sort of predator.

I appreciate all the feed back. I can tell you I did take her to get counseling. After about 2 months we quit going because I don't believe any reall good came of it. My daughter did not deny what she had done to the counselor but did not open up to her any more than she did me so it really just cost me alot of money with very little results. I do know that she has not been abused. I have told her since she was VERY young that if anyone even touched her or asked her to do any inappropriate things she could come to me. As a victim of abuse this is a subject I have always been very vocal about with her. I do agree that it is somewhat "normal" behavior but I wish it wasn't. I am not the only parent to deal with this but I still feel very alone in it. I certainly can't talk to anyone in my family about this or any of her friends parents for fear of having unnessacery harsh judgement passed on my daughter. Chinagirl....I just can't bring myself to tell my daughter that I'm ok with her masturbating. I suppose I really don't have a problem with it but I'm not going to advocate it either. My best friend suggested I get her a vibrator. I CAN'T take my 12 yr old to go get one of those. I guess I'm still taking it day by day and she still does not have her phone and limited access to the computer. Thank u all for your advice!