What is Stress Management
Stress management defines stress as a person's physiological response to an external stimulus that triggers the "fight-or-flight" reaction. Causes of stress: Work, life, many thing...
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My Sister
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I LOVE HER! But she adds alot of stress to my life. We have a huge family. She's the last one of us girls that is still single.Not just single, but a single mother of 2. It seems like b/c of this my whole family really keeps a close eye on her and what she does! Out of all of us she is pretty close to me. I'm just about the only person that she will talk to about any personal issues. So, knowing this, I kind of feel like I need to listen to her problems and need to try to help her out.
She's very BOOK SMART, but beyond that she seems dumb as a rock. She allows men to use her, and can't even see that's what's goin on. Then she makes up excuses for them. Putting the blame on herself. I know when there's trouble in a relationship its not just one persons fault. But I can't seem to get her to see that! Now this hasn't affected just me, but my other sisters are concerned also! So, is the rest of my family. But the thing that really set off bells for me was when I realized that her and her oldest childs relationship has deminished b/c of this. But she doesn't see that either. I have spoken 2 him and he has told me point blank," what my mother does is no longer of any concern to me I DON"T CARE!" I guess what I am wanting to find out is; is there something that i can do to help her w/o putting myself right in the middle of it all. That maybe she will except! B/c normally she won't except anyones help. I have just started ignoring her calls. But I feel horrible about that. I really do love my sister and would like to help. Please does anyone have any advice. Posted on 06/13/09, 12:06 pm |
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Sorry to hear about your situation. Your sister is her own person and she is making her own choices in life, though I understand how frustrating that must be for you when those choices lead to unhappiness or negative consequences for her children. Have you spoken to her about your concerns???
Hope the situation gets better. 
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Yes, I have tried talking to her about the choices she makes. How they effect not only her but the ppl around her and her kids in particular. Unfortunately, she doesn't see how her choices r the wrong ones.
She doen's even realize how she's messed upi th relationship b/w her and her son. They used to be tight! It's very disheartening!
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I can relate to this story, my sister has been in abusive relationships for the past 15 yrs, has 3 grown kids ,she has no relationship with them, she literally abandoned them ,they got tired of watching her go through domestic violence, hunger, evictions, she is a type 2 diabetic and had open heart surgery a few yrs ago, I have helped her raise her children and many many times helped her leave these men, and turn around and go back and be abused and used over and over, now her mind is copletely gone shes 48 yrs. old ,does drugs and drinks with her husband shes on disability and all her money goes for rent, when the husband goes to jail she will do better and has filed for divorce twice, he couldnt stand her 17 yr old son so she took him to his sisters and dropped him off, and back to the husband,hes been in prison alot,a drunk, mean to her, has 3 way sex and my sister just does what he says, a few times she has left she sits like a zombie grieving for him, even thogh he has taken her money for rent and spent it on drugs, its so sad, I cant help anymore its to paunfull for me, its like watching a loved one drowning in the ocean and you cant reach them, I pray alot, I saw my mother go through the same abuse, death would be a welcome event they would be better off in heaven with God
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Since your sister is blinded by love so to speak, the best thing you can is just express your concerns in a none confrontational way and be her sister.
Like a past poster said, unfortunately there's not much you can do since your sister is old enough to make her own choices. Its so hard sometimes watching the people we love treating the wrong people right and the right people wrong. If she still doesn't come around after you try to talk to her, then the only thing you can do is let the relationship play out either positively or negatively and pray that she learns her lesson, especially if since its straining her relationship w/ your nephews I hope things improve soon! GOOD LUCK!! :D
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