What is Step Families
Traditionally, a stepfamily is the family one acquires when a parent enters a new marriage, whether the parent was widowed or divorced. For example, if one's mother dies and one's ...
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My Step-Daughter and Step-Son
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i have 3 step-children, 2 sons and 1 daughter. The youngest is 15 months and we have had him since he was 3 months. Ive been in the kids lives for almost 2 years and they are 4, 3, and 15 months. The baby of course loves me i am all he knows and he calls me mommy....but the other two its different. They havent seen their mother since january 17th of this year! THATS 8 MONTHS! They tell me they Love me and they kiss and hug me, but when it comes down to it, they dont want me around. They want their daddy to do things for them and even when they get a spanking they want their daddy to do it and not me!-and i mean not a beating or anything-they are babies!! If i ask if i can sleep with them they say no, but if daddy asks they say yes! when they are with their grandparents and get in trouble all the grandparents have to say is ill tell mommy-jenn and they are like no no no! if i tell them im going to leave do they want me to come back they say no! lots of times i feel they say they love me and stuff just because they think they will get into trouble if they dont! i feel like they hate me and dont want me to even be here! its very stressful and heartbreaking! i literally have cried myself to sleep because this hurts my heart! WHAT DO I DO?! has anyone else been through this?! my husband says its a phase but i dont know...
Posted on 09/17/09, 03:09 pm |
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Yes it is a phase. I got three step kids mt self. It was tuff at first. But I loved them all the same. And I made sure they all new it. Its tuff but hang in there. it will get better. They all call me Dad. They dont know me as there step Dad. They know me as there Dad. It took time. About 4 years. Good luck 
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Yes Jenn, I was there when my SD was 2yo and it lasted for a few years after. I too was in her life though since she was 4 mos. but we always had only weekend visits. Anyways, for children I think it is a phase. My son was doing that more when he was 3-5yo and now that he is 6yo, he doesn't mind hanging out more with mommy. But in a step situation, I would just respect their preference and ask DH to help them understand that sometimes you have to take care of things for them. Keep a united front no matter what. Establish your role and stick with it. My SD is 13yo now, and the tables have turned. She would rather hang out with me rather than dad...
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Thank God I'm not alone!!!
I have exactly same feelings. I live with two step children: 2 and 4.5 year-old. They prefer Mommy or their nanny to me. When they are not listening to me or tell me "Go away!", I take it so personally. They call me daddy now, they show their affection to me, but when they are cranky... I just want to run away, because their words hurt me so much :( I'm just trying to be patient...
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