Single Dads Support Group

don't have that problem. Unfortunately, the judge in my county was too kind to me and at least gave me 50% custody but also ordered me to pay her because I earned more at the time...
I kept the family home and incurred all the marital debt on top of having to pay her. The kids had fine dining at mom's (out to eat at least twice per week), and had hot dogs and mac & cheese at dad's and played monopoly and scrabble. I've since had another major reduction in earnings and finally got a judge to listen to me, now I only pay her a 1/4 of what I was.
There's lots of things me & the kids did that were free that they didn't do with mom. I bought an annual pass to our city's science center and go there at least half dozen times per year which broke our per trip cost minus gas & parking to about $10 a visit for a 5-6+ hour event.
We also take many bike rides, fishing, hiking, etc.
Anything that's outdoors, gets them to explore nature and is free for me. Those are the most memorable times.
As far as deadbeat, my only qualm was I didn't fight harder for f/c but felt that even as flakey and unreliable as my ex is, she's still their mother. Kids can make a determination when they're a little older who they feel is the parent who's always there for them.
Good luck with getting paid. I'd say pretend it doesn't exist and then when it does it's a nice surprise and you can actually put in a savings acct. for the kids' when they get to college or something...

DWH,

yep,

my stbx has only been around my daughter 3 times in 3 1/2 months, and the last time was ony because her parents forced her to spend time with my daughter.

she tells everyone she doesn't have a child and stopped paying child support 5 months ago, although last month she paid... who knows if she will continue to pay or not.

I can keep the threads together, but just barely... I don't get any extras for myself and just the barest of extras for my daughter, which she totally deserves since she's been so damned good through this last year and it could have been so much worse.

It will be in the divorce decree and if i have to, i'll have maintainance take it out of her pay... Mind you, if it gets to that stage, I won't let her get away with paying what she's paying now... she'll have to pay the full amount.

right now she just gives me enough to pay for half of the childcare costs... the law, here, says that she should pay for that AND a set amount for regular expenses... which essentially almost doubles what she's paying... if she keeps screwing things up and not pay, i'll go for the bigger amount that my daughter is entitled to have.

I know your pain dude... it sucks the royal hind tit.