Sexually Transmitted Diseases - Female Support Group

I just want to know when you have an outbreak, does it make you relive your nightmare over? I remember telling a girl friend of mine about a blister on my leg, and she started teasing me and said that I had herpes. I didn't exactly know what it was, but I looked it up, and the symptoms were like that's it. I haven't told many people, because I was embarassed. I wish that I could've told my sister, but she has a friend that has herpes, and she confided in my sister. My sister in terms, told everyone and called her "herpes" names behind her back. She says things like "I'm not sitting on the toilet behind her nasty A&%". I want to say so bad, that am I a nasty A&%?

I have too much on my plate to try dating. First, I'm a breast cancer survivor. Guys can't handle that even though I had complete reconstruction. Its hard to tell. Telling them that I have herpes only adds a cherry on top of this sundae. At my age(52), height(6ft) and size(20) on a scale 1-10, its a negative (-10) for dating. I will grow old without love

Well I've had herpes for 1 year now (how I regret so much!) but I've never ran into that yet but I know that now that we have this STD, we have to think how we were suppose to think before we had herpes...wait til the right guy comes, you'll know when you see him, go get tested together and have protected sex, don't rush into things, be careful, and when you feel you have that right guy, tell him! If he doesnt stay with you, like that other women said...he's just not the right one for you.

Well, I had to tell my fiancee I have HPV. He didn't even blink, and he said that's ok. He told me I shouldn't obsess about it, and that there are things that can be done. He was very good about it and sweet. I am lucky to have such an understanding guy in my life.

Remember, there are treatments, and with all the technological advances being made so quickly these days, you might even be able to get rid of it. I just read an article that says charging the virus with a negative charge will kill it since the virus is anaerobic.

But like I said, there are treatments that can reduce outbreaks, which you are obviously on, and you can have a normal sex life. If your lover really truly loves you, you will both find a way to cope. And yes sitting down with them and explaining the facts is a good method. It's not easy, but who said life was going to be easy?

It sounds like you need a little confidence and self-esteem boost. Go out with some friends, or pamper yourself at the spa. Get a new hair color or cut. Do what you like, that makes you feel good. Get a massage, I highly recommend massage for just about any ailment. Have you considered therapy?

Sounds like you are a proud mother. Congrats on having a healthy child :)

I hope I've helped a little..*hug*

I have had genital herpes for over 5 years. Once I found out my then boyfriend & I broke up and I quit dating because I thought no other man would want me. I was too afraid to tell a potential lover that I had herpes and didn't want to face rejection. Recently I began seeing someone and when the time came for us to be intimate I told him. He accepted it well and we continued seeing each other but then soon after he told me he just couldn't pursue a relationship with me....I was crushed and now feel as though I will never find someone that can accept me and this disease. I am an intelligent, healthy, attractive 40 year old woman with grown children and feel so alone. My family & friends have no idea as this is my dirty little secret and they don't understand why I am alone. It was nice to find this site so I could share my story with others in the same situation.

I know the feeling. When I found out I had herpes, I had to tell my ex-boyfriend. i was crying so hard and he just didn't react so much?? Then he told me "Ohh..it is done..not much we can do about it but I do care.." What was that??? Did he know? It does not matter now because he cheated on me and I decided to break it off with him. It has been four years now since I've dealt with herpes and I am not with my ex boyfriend anymore. Now I never told anyone close to me..especially my friends or family I have herpes. I can't bring myself to say it. I only told two men but they didn't freak out. They accpeted it but I just can not bring myself close to them yet because I am so afraid to be close.
Now.. I dont have children and I hope if I happen/decide to have children, I hope they will be free from the disease. Did any of you have C-Section in order to deliver the children???

hey everybody!!
I thought I would share... I really did alot of stuff I was not proud of in my late teens and early 20's...thus resulting in herpes...
The first 3-4 guys I told were ok with it. I admit there were a couple guys I didnt tell (yes I feel guilty)
I have always had protected sex... anyway last year I had 3 guys break up with me because they could not handle that I had herpes. It crushed me, but I cant blame them!
Anyway...a few weeks ago I starteed dating and amazing guy. I told him right away. He seems to be ok with it, but he is very worried about getting it. We always have protected sex, but what else can we do??? I have never been on Valtrex because my breakouts are so few and far between, but would it help? Any other advice would be great! I dont want to hurt or loose him!

I'm worried because I want to have children someday but then I risk infecting my boyfriend.... :(

Blue Lemon said almost everything that I would have said. All that I can add to her wonderful words of wisdom is:

- Don't give up and be too hard on yourself. In fact, the more confident you can be and the more you participate in things that build that confidence, the better your whole life will be.

- Did you read those statistics she posted? When you tell a guy, tell him the stats. If he has a brain, he'll realize that being with someone brave enough to tell him and protect him puts him at less risk than hooking up with someone new!

- I always asked for them to think about how hard it was for me to tell them and please respect me for that and never try to hurt me with that information. Believe it or not, no one has thrown it back at me or "outed me" yet.

I started seeing this guy & before my 3rd date with him I told him that we needed to talk about something very very serious. He was so freaked out that his mind went to the wort case senario; he even thought that maybe I was a Transsexual woman.

When we met i rehearsed & calmy told him that I had herpes & how I got it. Apparently herpes was not the worse thing that he had thought about. I also told him that a lot of adults have the virus & may not know it. He got tested, found out that he ALSO has the virus & had no clue.

That was four years okay... were still together & engaged.