Sexual Abuse Support Group

omggg im 16.
the first time i got one was wen my parents wudnt believe me iwen i said my abuser didnt rape me.....i was in panic and wud stop shaking and crying. my mom was there with me...but she was like are u a baby..w/e

the 2nd time i went to a new GYN because i have this cyst that wont stop growing....that one i was having a heart attack panic and aagain i cudnt breath and was shaking but i didnt cry cuz she was rly nice and was able to calm me down but i wasnt with anyone in the room...she told me to close my eyes and breathe wen she heard my heart racing with the stethoscope

but i dont wanna go to a gyn i cnt

For me it doesn't even have to be a Gynologist - just going to the doctors make me panic and cry. I haven't been to one since my last son's birth, 4 years ago. I'm still trying to come to terms with his birth! It was very traumatic and triggering for me.....

hi i have just got a letter about my smear, i hate them because of my rape it will be a female nurse doing mine it was a female nurse that raped me, i have had the marina coil fitted since that was upsetting but that was hard too does anyone have any coping tips 4 me? i a, currently awaiting counseling which should come up in the next couple of weeks!

Hopeismine,

I've had one pap smear in my life, and it took me *for-ever* to be bold enough to get one. It was one of the worst things I've done with a doctor. Luckily, it was a lady doctor, and she was very kind. It actually took two tries - I had to reschedule and made up some excuse about menstruating heavily and all...

I've got a new doctor now, one that I've seen once. I am in a much better space now, talking more openly about the abuse and my other issues (eating/alcohol) than I ever have. She was very considerate, but also firm. She said that it's in my best interest and hers to get another pap smear soon, next year when I'm more comfortable with the idea and with her. She said that she'd be willing to give me a sedative for the procedure. I'll have to find transportation to and from her office, but I have a friend who knows and I think will help.

This is such a good thing to talk about. We've got to take care of ourselves the best we can, and, yes, getting a pap smear seems to be part of the process of maybe not healing but being sure our bodies are OK.

HUGS. It will be all right.

ive had two pap smears my whole life which was one about a year ago and one a couple of months ago, i believe it traumatized me becuze of the abuse and all, now i have a phobia of latex gloves which i have to wear at work now. the second one wasnt all thatg bad becuze i knew what to expect . you need a friend or a significant other to go with you and a really nice understanding doctor .

I think that this is why I freaked out so much at my last women's annual exam. I am just digging and remembering past abuse issues and this one particular day that I went for my last exam was horrible. I had a female doctor thankfully or it could have been worse. But the whole time I was having the exam I just felt so violated and afterwards I engaged in cutting myself to relieve some of the pain. Thank you for sharing this with me because you truly put words to what I was feeling and I thank you for that.

It IS hard...bring a friend..a book, your ipod, your phone to fiddle with...any distraction. Let your doctor IN on what happened. It is confidential (unless you are a minor, they will not report)
Good luck...you need an Exam EVERY YEAR, not every two...not worth risking your life over.
You will feel very proud of yourselves having done it and it WILL get easier, I promise.

Doctors in general freak me out, Itry to avoid them as much as possible. I have never been to a gyn. 0ne of my biggest fears is beibg seen naked. I'm just really uncomfortable with somebody looking or touching me down there. I'd probably freak if I had to take a pap smear.

i haven't gotten one yet either, but my doctor keeps telling me i'm going to have to. next time i see her i don't think she will really let me put it off any longer. i'm incredibly nervous for it. i don't think i'm strong enough at all to be able to handle it. i'm just trying not to think about it until i have to do it.

I am, in addition to being an abuse survivor, a cervical cancer survivor.

Yes, Pap Smears are terrifying...they are violating and uncomfortable, but they are SO important. It's your life we're talking about. My cancer was caught early enough that it was treatable and I don't really have any adverse affects. Had I not stayed on top of my Paps, it could have been much, much worse. Possibly fatal.

The person before me was absolutley correct, you need them annually. Tell your doctor that you were abused and you have anxiety related to exams. They can probably give you some anxiety meds to help you. It's so important.