Sexual Abuse Support Group

you r doing the right thing by going to the cops. you are a good parint. just remember that and be there for them.

First, I am so sorry this has happened to your children. The feelings you speak about are normal. You are NOT overreacting. We have all experienced anger and rage at being hurt, and is the same when your children have been hurt. Would help to see a counselor or therapist. Please feel free to express here. There is nothing I would not do to help my child.

I am so sorry for you and your girls. You are not overeacting, any loving concerned parent would do/feel the same way. I think sometimes people who have not been abused do not understand the impact it has on a person's life. I would hound them until something is done. Maybe seeing a therapist would help you and your gils cope? You will find the support you need to get through on this forum, WE are on your side.

The YWCA in some towns have a support group for significant others who have a child, or a husband or a wife who was sexually assaulted. The counseling is free. Good for you that you believed your children. You will find that a lot of parents sweep the abuse under the rug, Or do not believe their children. You should be proud that you reported it and are standing by them. The rage, the anger is to be expected. As a survivor once I felt the rage, anger, expressed it in group therapy it lost some of its sting. Talking about is so cathartic and healing.

Try contacting your local area Council on Sexual Assault. They have group meetings as well as individual counseling. They are very helpful to those who have been assaulted as well as significant others. We are all here for you : )

Thank you all for all of the kind words. I have my girls in therapy now and it is going well. For myself I did go to a therapist this past week and ended up feeling worse. All the therapist spoke about was past cases that she worked with and the perp got off too easily. She urged me to sue civilly, which of course the thought has crossed my mind but at this point I am just trying to cope with this recent information. I know that there are other therapists that are out there and maybe I will try them.

At the risk of sounding over callous, you as the parent are the only person who can actually care.
No one will care for your flesh and blood children except you as their parent(s).

Anyone else either has a paid occupation to care, or are victims like us posting on this forum seeking empathy.
Many people out there who can help, but they will never care more for your children than they do for themself; Tom S. in Tn.

Someone does care. You did the right thing by reporting the perp. I hope the authorities are able to prosecute him. For now, I think it would be a good idea for you and your children to see a family therapist. I know it's small comfort but you're doing the best you can and you're a good parent.

I wonder if he abuses his own kids.

I am so sorry...your anger/rage, frustration, having fantasies of revenge and depression are all normal reactions...I dk who is telling you that you're over reacting but it's preposterous and very insensitive to you...easy for them to say... if it were my daughters I've be beside myself, it's true through you now have to allow the "system" to run it's course and it moves agonizing slow.

Your feelings are normal and understandable but as best you can you must make your focus, your daughters. I'm glad to hear your daughters are coping well...it makes it even more important you find a way to get your emotions in control and if you just can't then seek counseling. Children are very sensitive and attuned into the emotional state of their parents. They draw strength from you and to a great extent as an indicator of what they should be feeling...if they're doing good, you must be hiding your feelings but you can't do that forever. If you find you can't keep your emotions fairly even around then (alone express as much as you need to to get it out) but as best as possible stay emotionally even as possible. If it's too much of a struggle then seek support to help you shore up your coping skills.
I'm so sorry it has to be horrible what your going through. I dk how recent it came out but time will help some and just know. It's not your fault, you didn't fail them or any of the other things many parents torture themselves with when something happens to their kids. Be kind to yourself. You probably already know these things but on the oft chance you're being hard on yourself in addition to the abuser, I wanted to remind you, please don't., you did nothing wrong and It's hard enough already. It will get better I promise.