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Discussion:
My boyfriend
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I just recently found out what was happening to me. What it was called. "Separation Anxiety" When my boyfriend and I hang out and he has to go, or it gets close to the time he has to go, I started to get very anxious and depressed. I beg the clock to slow down time. My boyfriend and I used to get into fights about it many many times. He called me "clingy" Up until today, I agreed with him. I mean, what other name was there for what I did? Now I understand that it's a mental disorder kind of thing. I'm really nervous about telling my boyfriend and I don't know if I even should. Can anyone please give me advice? It would be greatly appreciated! Thank you.
Posted on 02/26/11, 04:48 pm
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Reply #1 - 03/02/11  7:42pm
" I understand what you are going through. I also have seperation anxiety. All the way up to my junior year of college it was anxiety related to my mom. It was very severe in elementary school and my sophmore year of college. I would be at school for 2 weeks then I would go home for the weekend and from the day i went back to school to three days after I would have stomach pains and crying spells. Now the separation anxiety is towards my boyfriend who lives in california while I live in NY. It is very hard. being together then having to part is very hard. I am very very anxious when I am not with him. my OCD is going crazy and my obsession that I am stuck in has gotten very severe due to the fact that I am not with him. I get very anxious even when i can not txt him and talking on the phone is the only thing that sooths me when he is not with me. He knows about all of my anxiety disorders and issues. He also has anxiety and we actually met on DS in january of 2010. So for me I guess it is different for my boyfriend to know everything but for me it really helps. Although I think if you told your boyfriend if he didn;t understand then I would say he is not a guy you should be with. Everyone has their own issues and if he can't accept you for you then something is wrong with him. I would talk to him about it so he can do things to help you. Couples are supposed to work together throught there problems and yes it is also his problem because you and him and a couple and whatever one person is going through so is the other. So go ahead and tell him. I hope this helps you. "
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Reply #2 - 03/04/11  1:30am
" I am the same way. My situation is very complicated. I have a Mood Disorder so I get irritated with my boyfriend very easily and tend to argue with him over the smallest things. He tries to be supportive, but everyone eventually reaches a point where they cannot take it anymore. I am away at college and he lives where I am from in a small town. Anyway, sometimes we get in heated arguments and he packs his stuff to leave. I become very insecure and start crying and my anxiety skyrockets. Then he ends up leaving and I am depressed for a few weeks until the argument is over. I had separation anxiety from my mom until I reached high school and now it has moved to him. I feel your pain. It sucks. :( "
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Reply #3 - 06/05/11  2:18pm
" i know exactly what you're dealing with. i'm 42 and i have separation anxiety disorder when it comes to my husband. everyone else just considers me jealous or needy. but they dont understand the trauma that being away from him causes me, even if its only while we are at work. its awful! i feel for you, and i'm here for you. "
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Reply #4 - 06/09/11  3:58am
" i'm sure I have this...people accuse me of being clingy or needy..but they have no idea of the anxiety that wells up inside me almost a panic at the thought of being alone.

I'm kicking myself because I'm wondering how much of this contributed to the break up of my long distance relationship..he often said he's like a drug to me....i mean..my main love language is words of affirmation and quality time..but it's more than that. not hearing from him would send me into a panic .. i sometimes feel like a crying toddler howling for comfort..deep inside I mean.

The rejection of people leaving me..of people passing on...the isolation.,,it totally cripples me. And I am an otherwise fairly confident outgoing person so it doesn;t make sense. "
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Reply #5 - 09/27/11  9:13pm
" Same here. I'm 24, I was attached at my moms hip from day 1. She passed due to Ovarian Cancer almost 1 year ago...since not having her around I'm attached to my boyfriend now. He's my drug and I'm addicted. It used to be before him an I were living together we would spend weekends together an then Sunday would come and I would be alone and I would freak out so I'd have to go an stay at my moms. Now with my boyfriend I want to go everywhere with him. Grocery stores, friends houses, fishing etc...He just left to go fishing today 2hrs away till the end of the week an I cried like a little baby, I made myself sick, my heart was racing. I instantly went into our room and grabbed one of his shirts that smells like him and have it next to my side. Really shitty thing is he doesn't get phone service where he is, he has to drive 20min from where he is to get service to call me. So I can't randomly text him and he text me back. :( It's getting dark outside and I'm nervous. I don't want to sleep in our bed alone tonight. I miss him so much. "

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