What is Self-Injury
Self-harm is also known as self-injury (SI), self-inflicted violence (SIV), self-injurious behavior (SIB), and self-mutilation, although this last term has connotations that some p...
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one stupid decision for another 5 years of lies?
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right so
what happens when you've lied about self injury for so long. and it comes to the point where you know it's stupid you know it's a decision (both the cutting action and the lying) And you know it'll end up as part of a lie along the line because somebody will notice the way it usually goes is the lie stays because being truthful about self injury would cause so much fuss or rejection or humiliation to an extent that you'd rather put yourself through the lies than face that. total utter misery and guilt. then comes the torment of all the lies, the lies eat you up inside yet you keep on lying and keep on bleeding because that's your decision I'm not sure which parts stupid any more. want to let go, want my lies to pour out of my arms. I can't win? Posted on 11/04/09, 08:11 pm |
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Don't beat yourself up. If you feel the need to TELL someonew, then go ahead. You never know: they may actually understand. At least, you won't be hiding.
HUGS Dljwriter. 
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Whew ... can totally relate. I'm lying pretty much non-stop lately, lying about the bandages, about why I'm always fully covered, lying about why I don't ever seem to eat anything. All of these lies are being directed towards my two children, whom I've never wanted to lie to or ever be the kind of mom who lies to her kids. I also lie to my coworkers and other family.
Not lying seems like an impossible choice. I can't stop, I can't tell, so lying is all that seems left. I keep fantasizing that I will someday get so thin or the cuts be seen by someone so that they take me away against my will ... I guess I can't face the disappointment I think others would have of me if I ever went and got the help I really needed voluntarily (inpatient). But for some reason I seem to be ridiculously good at lying and keeping things going. It's getting worse though, so I know eventually all these lies are going to come crashing down on me. Sorry if I wasn't much help, but I know how you feel :) If you come up with a solution, I would love to know it. Hugs, Xena
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Wow Like when your not young and stupid and not knowing what slash why your doing it, now we know what it is and we are still choosing to do it, we are still choosing to lie, and keep lying about where the scars come from, ugh I hate that part, especialy when the scars are realy noticible so the story has to fit the part it cant just be cat scratched me.
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I know exactly how you feel! Lying seems so much easier than worry about reactions! I'm tired of lying myself and just want to let it out. Yet I don't want to be judge. People are so quick to judge these days. So I stay in silence and if someone happens to see a cut I lie. I've told so many I don't know why certain people believe it! Maybe they know but want say anything.
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