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I found this short article and wanted to share with all of you. I thought this son put into words so eloquently what many of us feel/felt at some point in our lives. Here's the article if you want to read it. If not I copied and pasted this man's struggle with acceptance of mental illness.

"Denial was a strong factor in my understanding and even when evidence of my own madness would be presented, my mind would find a way to weave out of the circumstance and an obtuse reasoning would somehow form that would keep my own pride intact.

Always two steps ahead of the truth, my brain would tapdance its way into a room where I was not at fault, where it was everybody else versus me, where I was some sort of prophet or special medium who was undergoing visions, not hallucinations, and I was important, not a victim.

It is very hard to understand that one’s own credibility is broken. There is a lot of personal shame one undergoes when they realize that they are no longer in line with society’s understanding of sane. It makes one doubt one’s own instincts and second guess the movements and decisions that one makes.

Suddenly, the veil of confidence and ability has been lifted and one is a wreck, struggling to piece together the remnants of what are left of one’s self image."
Posted on 04/06/13, 03:22 am
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Reply #11 - 04/06/13  7:06pm
" Makes alot of sense Caz. Thanks

Yes Max, alot of anxiety about meeting new doc. I want to get with one and stay with one for several years. Fluctuations in insurance has caused me to have to change a few times in the past 10 years. Now I'm on medicaid so fingers crossed.

My sister just stopped by and she said she knows my pdoc professionally, thinks very highly of him so that sets me at ease somewhat. "
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Reply #12 - 04/06/13  7:12pm
" I'm going to have to change docs soon because I'm moving, so I'm nervous as well. I like my current docs and don't want to start all over again and explain my life story to new docs. Especially since they'll be university doctors. "
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Reply #13 - 04/06/13  10:21pm
" I hope it goes well for you dixie. "
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Reply #14 - 04/07/13  4:55pm
" thank you! "

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