What is Rheumatoid Arthritis
Rheumatoid arthritis (RA) is traditionally considered a chronic, inflammatory autoimmune disorder that causes the immune system to attack the joints. It is a disabling and painful ...
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ALMOST BITCH-SLAPPED MY CO-WKER
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uggggghhhggghgghghhghg!
Do any of you remember Ally MCBEAL? Remember when she would day dream about doing bad things happening to people. Well I almost did more than imagine. My BP was pumping and I was poised for the inevitable when......my supervisor heard the tone in my voice and called me in her office.....DAMN! she knew I was locked and loaded. I have a Hypochondriac friend/co-worker who I am considering distancing myself from after today. This Hypochondriac co-wrker of mine will not stop whining about her swollen finger. She is convinced she has an autoimmund disease...when her doctors even told her the swelling was not consistent with RA or Lupus more like and injury. I have RA and I know she doesn't! She kept at me and at me today about her hands. I finally told her well maybe you should stop playing basketball 3 times a week if you are having these problems, your just agitating them. She replied well I will never stop!!!. Well when I pointed out to her that her fingers while yes swollen, they are NOT RED, AND NOT HOT TO THE TOUCH AND ITS HER WHOLE FINGER! NOT JUST THE JOINT>>>>>AHHHHHH! She said well, my knees and ankles have been hurting so bad I can hardly drive. REALLY, THEN WHY/HOW CAN SHE STILL PLAY BASKETBALL (VIGOROUSLY BTW IVE SEEN HER IN ACTION) WITH SO CALLED ACHY KNEES AND ANKLES TO THE POINT SHE CAN HARDLY DRIVE. I CANT TAKE IT ANYMORE, EVERYONE IN THE OFFICE THINKS SHE IS A HYPO, CUZ IT IS ONE THING OR ANOTHER EVERY SINGLE DAY. I hurt all the time but try to keep it to myself or just say, just the same old RA bullpucky. SO there I was starting to derail/ pummel her. I stood up and started pointing my finger and getting more pissed and just when I was about to really get in her face my supervisor called me in and I started crying. ALL of my DS friends, you all know whats been going on with me between the RA and mY Brain shit. My supervisore said "Thats IT!" SO she pulled the said co-worker aside. My supervisor told the hypocondriac that,"Dawn has enough on her plate right now and that she does not want her to talk to me anymore about her theorized RA. B/C all it does is worry me and remind me of my own problems" She also told her "she wants me to be able to come to work and not have to deal with that, that I should be able to come to work and just focus on work." This is the way my supervisor put it, but we all know that quite frankly it just hurts and I have no more compassion and patience left in me for her constant hycondriac complaints. I feel we all who truly have RA bear the badge, the purple heart, if you will. For someone to try to say they have it, when I know they are faking, is INSULTING. Cause if she had what I had, she would know the unbearable pain you get and the dark places it takes you, she would know that you have to change your lifestlye or you'll suffer. She would know how much I HURT and could relate. Most of all she would actively seek treatment and relief and she doesnt! there is too many wholes in her story, and too many contradictory actions on her part. I probably would have been able to muddle thru her babbble, if it wasn't for such stressful recent events (my brain), but when she found out about my brain, she just looked at me and "You shouldn't worry about it, its fixable they will just have to put a shunt in your brain. At that very moment, my heart sank, I was saddened, after all I comofrted her thru to that point. And for her to say that to me. Its not just a shunt, its my brain, its surgery on my brain, so far my MD thinks its normal pressure hydrocelphalus. Its not just a shunt, its my life and I am scared to death for my kids, for my husband and for me. But SHE doesn't care cuz here finger is swollen. So I think I have got to stop being her friend and just BE a very distant coworker, I think she is toxic. I was so worked up, I almost vomited in my supervisors office, and right now I can't let people do that to me. I am blessed to have my supervisor, she cares deeply for me and so do the other gals in the office. They are all tired of this hypo, and hopefully she will back off. Sorry for the rant, I just needed to let it out. By this time next week I suspect, this hYpocondriach will start having brain problems too....we'll see Posted on 11/04/09, 11:11 pm |
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People can be crazy!! Glad to hear your supervisor is supportive. I work with someone who says she has R.A. and other auto-immune, and yet she is not on any meds for such diseases?? She complains all the time. And I am limping around working my ass off over 40 hours a week. I finally told her why isn't she on meds to help her. She just said she didn't want to do them..?? Go figure. Also have a neighbor who doesn't work at all and recently complained of her finger hurting her. No redness, swelling etc..and yet she practically cries over it. I told her, yea, welcome to my life every day. Fingers hurt, toes, shoulder etc...this disease is so hard to explain to others. And people just don't have a clue. The stress your co-worker caused you is not worth it. You are right to try and distance yourself. It is just not worth the stress. 
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I lost (or chose to lose) a long time friend about a year and half ago because of the same problem. She was such a bad Hypochondriac that she went to the walk-in clinic at least 16 times a year... more than once a month with minor complaints. Her over-medicating herself for these minor complaints caused most of her real health issues. She got an ulcer from taking too much ibuprofen. Now the ulcer was serious and she had to be very careful for over year until it healed. Other than the fact that's she's been overweight most of her life she's in perfect health physically… she’s just not healthy emotionally.
I was able to ignore that personality quirk when I was healthy but not so much when I got really sick. I think people like that are really just trying to commiserate with you and relate to you buy taking on your illness. They want to share it with you but choose an inappropriate way of doing it. They unfortunately don’t realize that they’ve never actually really been sick a day in their life. They have no perspective. Anyone who has been really, really sick doesn’t pretend to know what another sick person is going through unless they have had the same disease confirmed by a doctor. I finally stopped calling my friend because I wasn’t able to keep my temper under control any longer either. You can only have so much patience when you’re in pain day in and day out. Considering the emotional toll this disease takes on each of us I think we should really only be surrounding ourselves with people who are emotional healthy… we’re gonna need all the emotional support we can get. Someone with Hypochondria can’t support a sick person… they need help themselves.
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Oh man do I ever hear you! I've got one just like her where I work! I finally just decided that health talk is off limits. I never talk about mine and if she gets started I get a blank stare and find an exit as quickly as possible. Oh! I forgot a bout a phone call I have to make excuse me! Is that my extension ringing?
Glad you have a supervisor who is supportive. Best of luck with everyrthing
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give her some of your meds? and lets see what happens lol just kidding but i do want to say that thank god that you have a supportive supervisor and i would try and stay away from her cause she doing nothing but getting you more and more upset which can make you sicker. oh yea tell her she need to wrap her finger real tight until it turns blue thats what people with ra have to do to control it even offer to do it for her lol. but seriously just stay away good luck to you
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I remember Ally McBeal! LOL
Your comment made me laugh after all you have been going through..."But SHE doesn't care cuz here finger is swollen. " THough this isnt a funny topic. You are completely right to STAY AWAY from her and others that put any kind of stress in your life. You are only looking out for yourself and your family. I have come to realize that I can't subject myself to extra stress with RA. You only have so much energy to work with each day and usually none left at the end to do what normaly people can do...chores, making dinner, etc. When you see her just take a deep breath and try to keep your distance. You are going through a lot and I completely understand the worry you must feel for yourself and family. Try to stay positive, you will get through this. It's so frustrating trying to get others to truly understand what a person with RA has to go through on a daily basis, isnt it?! On another forum I belong to, a person told me to show my husband "the spoon theory" ,...maybe you should post this up at your work for others to read! http://www.butyoudontlooksick.com/...
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I am so glad that you have a supportive supervisor - that is really important. I know the type of person you are talking about and they are toxic. Distancing yourself is a great idea.
Lynne
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I am sorry you had to deal with someone so goofy. I'm glad your boss was understanding and did what she could. Your co-worker should be ashamed of herself and her behavior. I hope you are able to distance yourself from her. Right now you have so much going on and to worry about that the last thing you need is some nutcase going on and on about a swollen finger. I hope your supervisor can really clamp down on this woman's carrying on. No one needs to put up with that, and it is insulting for someone to be so sure they have the same disease you are suffering with and to go on and on about it. Honestly, some people are just nuts!
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I have to say, I had a chuckle thinking of Ally McBeal, and being able to bitch slap someone like that - too funny. What isn't funny is that you have to deal with a self-centered boob like her. Ticks me off. Hopefully come next review the supervisor will keep this event in mind and perhaps recommend the girl take a hike. In the meantime, heck yes, stay as far away from her as you can! Hugs, Lisa
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Ok I am going to add my thoughts...
I have swollen joints but nothing is red. I played sports and now I don't due to the never ending pain in my hands, wrists, knees, tendons. All started out as if I injured myself but it kept adding on and on. I have seen a doc who feels it is auto immune and I am on meds. Coworkers straight away said it was my sports but it was so much more. The pain became to much and I felt very alone until I found the doctor. I guess last I have read on here how people don't understand the disease. We have to remember some do believe and come to us for our help to explain. I was very sad with my coworkers dismissing my pain and it seemed every week brought on something new that hurt. Thank goodness for DS and for those who helped me through my trouble. I don't hurt right now and hope to get back to being somewhat active. So I ask before you stay away from the coworker consider just maybe this person needs someone who understands. Because just maybe she does have something. I am sorry but just my thoughts. So many on DS helped me.
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Just to add...I do hope you feel better. I am very happy to hear your boss stepped in. Do feel better.
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