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Discussion:
Is it rape if it's your own husband?
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Shortly after we got married, we were in honeymoon stage and having sex everyday, but one night I said no, so we went to sleep (at least I did)< and I woke up to him rolling me over, climbing on top of me and having intercourse with me.
I didn't like that, I had said no... but I was 23, and I thought, well, he is my husband, so I guess it's ok.

So I had convinced myself that it was okay

Another time I was sitting on the edge of the bed after a shower with just a t-shirt on, and my husband got out of the shower and we had been arguing earlier and were still mad at each other, so he got out of the shower and came to me on the bed saying to LAY DOWN so he could have sex with me and I said NO. I was mad at him, I didn't want to have sex.. So he went to grab my legs and I crossed them, so he tried to pull them apart and I held them crossed tighter and then I laughed and he got so mad took his fist and hit my leg really hard, spread my legs, pushed me back on the bed and had sex with me while I was crying.

Is it rape? I'm so confused.
Posted on 02/16/11, 04:04 pm
15 Replies | Most Recent Add Your Reply
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Comment:
Email me when others reply to this topic help
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Reply #1 - 02/16/11  6:01pm
" Yes, sad to say but it is rape. No means no, married or not. "
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Reply #2 - 02/16/11  10:14pm
" Yes. Marriage does not change the meaning of no. I'm sorry this happened to you. Have you thought of seeking help and/or getting out of the marriage? "
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Reply #3 - 02/16/11  11:52pm
" I guess it would be the same as date rape. I just am in denial sort of, I don't know..... I feel lost, shamed, guilty... really depressed. "
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Reply #4 - 02/17/11  4:50am
" You've nothing to feel ashamed or guilty about in this. It wasn't your fault. Seeing a counsellor and talking about it can really help.

I do hope you're able to get the support you need. "
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Reply #5 - 02/18/11  4:54am
" Yes It is rape no means no and add in the violence domestic abuse adn rape . ru safe now ? You deserve better . "
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Reply #6 - 02/18/11  3:50pm
" Yes, it is rape. And drbeaker is right, no means no, all the time. "
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Reply #7 - 02/19/11  1:48am
" Now what do I do? I just don't know what to do..what to think.. "
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Reply #8 - 02/19/11  1:51am
" I'm so confused I don't really know how to feel. Mostly feel ashamed. Don't really want to be around people at all. Depressed. I just keep thinking Gosh I was so stupid, in denial, should have left him, WHY did I stay.. that means I just let him do this to me, which means it's my fault. "
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Reply #9 - 02/19/11  2:16pm
" Hey yes it is rape my husband raped me it's not your fault don't blame yourself it's his. If u ever wanna talk just message me take care "
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Reply #10 - 02/19/11  3:47pm
" Yes it is. Its good to figure that out ow thoughthen later. My mom was raped by her first husband and she didnt know until years and years later than rape is still rape. drbeakeris right. married or not no means no. it's heartbreaking. im so sorry that happened to you. "

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