What is Prescription Drug Abuse
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Help for friend, son is an addict.
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Advice is needed. Please help.
The situation is that my best friend, 47, is ( as sorry as I am to say this) a weak, soft person and an enabling mother. She immigrated here 12 years ago, her son follwed her a few years later. To make the long story short, her son is 22. During the time they both lived in US, in my opinion, she spent more time on her marital problems than on raising and counseling her son. She did the best she could, she is kind and genrous, she is not a horrible person, just really co-dependent. This kid had zero discipline growing up. Right now her son finally enrolled into a University from a community college, he has been working in a pizzeria. In the past year he ran up a credit card dept close to 2000S. he pays no bills or nor he helps at home. He sleeps most of the time when he is at home, he has no girlfriend and hangs out with the same 3 people. She began to suspect drug use from change in behavior and the fact that he stole her prescription meds lately and even 2 years ago. She got his urine sample from the bathroom and the home test showed positive for coke and opiates. in the last month he took her darvocet and hydrocodone ( she just had surgery). She brought me some pills she found in his gym bag and I identified them as Methocarbamol and Suboxone. She also brought me tubes made from cut up pens with white residue. I think we all know what these are. The kid is denying everything and is yelling every time she confronts him. I am the closest thing to family she has here. She lives alone with her son. I need your opinions on how can she persuade him to get help? What kind of \"weapons\" can she use? your advice will be appreciated. Posted on 05/12/09, 10:05 pm |
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Hey Aronia,
I know the only thing that worked for me was when my parents and family told me if I continue to use drugs then I no longer have a family. They would not see or speak to me...If she is to do this she must stick with it....It is called creating bottom and sometimes it is just what you need Jamie 
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Ok well this sucks big time but I know a lot about this stuff so this is what I would tell her to do...it"s called "TOUGH LOVE" Buy the book, not sure who the author is but it's a must when dealing with something like this. She needs some back bone or she will never win or change him. If he has had is way for his whole life then this is going to be her worse night mare.
She should also sign up for "Alon on" it's like AA but it's for people who are dealing with a drug addicts or acohol abuse. They will help a lot. My whole family went for my sister and the knownledge we got really helped. Another thing is an intervention. If your in the USA she can watch a program called intervention, it's on A&E or The Learning Channel but it comes on mostly at night. It will show how bad an addict can get and what they do to help that person...it's hard core for TV but it will give her some great ideas. Also google drug addicted help and see what comes up. There are a lot of ways to help people like her son but it's almost impossible for it to work unless he wants it really bad!! If none of this works then the day after he pulls a stunt or she catches him at anything tell him he is out of the house with NO money NONE and put him out on the streets...that's why it's called tough love. I wish her and her son well, V
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He has to hit a low point before he will get help. She needs to tell him she will do everything in her power to help him live but will no longer help him dy!
Jamie is right. It's also called tough love like firefly said. You have some good advice here today and there is not much I can add but keep coming back and keep us updated. Al anon is a great support group for both her AND you! They have meetings in every city and town in America. I have Direct tv and intervention is on a&e at 9 pm channel 265 on Monday night Good Luck and TC!
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my son started using drugs and drinking at probably 14, not sure, I tried what I could but he still used, then he dropped out of school his senior yr when he turned 18, it was Dec. he was failing anyways and he knew that. but he had a job and had worked since he was 15, and he really didn't get in to any trouble. But I had 2 younger daughters at home still and I made some rules for him to follow and his girlfriend was living with us also, so when he couldn't follow the rules that were very lenent, like if your going to smoke pot go outside, and he wouldn't listen, so he was 18, so I told him to pack his stuff and leave, hardest thing I had to do, cause after that he wouldn't talk to me for 4yrs, and since then he has got in alot of trouble spent time in jail for domestic violence, but after 40days in jail and he's 25 now, he's finally straightened up, so tough Love works but its hard, thats why its called tough Love, and now we have been talking and he has apologized to me and its great, so tell your friend she's not helping her son any by letting him continue to use here and steal from her. Best of Luck to her, I feel her emotional pain.
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Well, if he is using Suboxone he might be trying to get off the oxycontin or any other opiates. Opiates are very addictive and they affect your brain so it's hard to stop. Suboxone can only be disolved under the tongue so I know for a fact that he isn't snorting that. It sounds like he's trying to quit on his own. All addicts, like myself, don't want to be confronted by family. They will lie and deny everything. He has to want to help himself. He may already be on the right track if he's not abusing these drugs. Suboxone has a 96% rate for helping quit doing pills. Plus, if you take suboxone and try to take another pill to get high you can't. The suboxone is made to do that. So before you judge your friends son be might be on his way to his own recovery in his own little way. Just tell her to be there for him. I you are open to talking to him without being mean and judgemental you may get a better reaction from him. I am only speaking from experience.
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