Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder Support Group

PSTD is something you learn to live along side you.
Each day it will impact in your life... some where some how... you just don't know when your PTSD will have it... visit itself upon you!....That is the nature of PTSD. It might be better to find yourself a good therapist some one you feel safe with that you can talk with.Also there are plenty of good books you can read about.
Viktor Frankl wrote Mans search for meaning he survived Auschwitz and other Nazi concentration camps.
In regards to your partner not being able to support you most people wouldn't have clue in how to cope with someone who has PTSD as they often feel powerless & helpless.
My hope is you can get some good resources behind you & i just want you to know it does get easier.
All the best take care of you CC

WOW sounds like me. I have given up on doctors I am sick if trying to get help last 2 I saw one said get over it the other the first time I saw him he said why are you here and said he didn't have a klot of time and kept tapping his watch and when i went to tell him he said no why are you her I was like you idiot if I knew I would be sitting here would I I walked out and have not gone to a doctor again that was a month 1/2 ago. I am sick if this PSTD I have suffer from a very young age they just didn't know what it was and then double fold more stuff happened and made it worse. I am like you I came on here in hope of something. I do not blame my spouse PTSD is not an easy thing to know how to deal with if it was we would have help. I can tell you the only thing that did help me was my PSD dog and I lost him 6 months ago because I dint know the law when renting and found out on Friday I will get him back. When I had my dog a lot of my symptoms were almost not there. I trained my own dog and he doesn't have to be certified just trained he know my emotions and me so when I am scared he comforts me when I cry he licks and tries to play. Just a suggestion. I hope I will get better when he comes back home this week. Good luck

I have never had a spouse or support from a significant other. I also have no family, and what relationships I have attempted to foster in terms of friends have proven detrimental. I am truly on my own and have been for many, many years (prior to and after my diagnosis).

I am sorry about your experiences with doctors. I have worked with two (over the course of about five years), and can say that I feel very fortunate to have had good helpers in this regard.

My encouragement to you...

It's a mixed bag out there. Keep trying. And when you fail, pick it up and try again.

Many doctors may feel discouraged because they don't have a cure for PTSD (not yet). It is frustrating for them as well.

As I approach a new doc, I approach it knowing this. And even though in many regards and because there isn't a cure, we are left to either accept their prescription or to our own devices, I am trying to find one who will work with me on my own theories--along with their expertise--to improve on the tools that I have that are working.

It can be very discouraging, but there IS hope! Hang in there. Part of our responsibility is to find appropriate help, too. You wanna pay someone to just sit there? Get on the phone and start making some calls.
You may also try talking with the new doc up front about your expectations up front to be sure you're on the same page.

Good luck!

I'm inclined to agree with Phloxinsox, there ARE good PTSD Dr's out there. Keep looking. A Dr that works for one person, may not be right for another. I have no spouse support either, and (for vocational reasons.) I CAN'T seek out a Dr. The folks here on DS provide as good a support group as I think you'll find. I hope you find the help you need. ~theGuardian.

Hi sister,

Having some form of support in this helps a lot. Daily Strength can really be that support if you don't have it from those around you.

You say your husband is a good guy, so I'm assuming he just doesn't understand what you're going through. I don't think anyone who doesn't have it ever can fully understand it, but my husband has gone from being like yours to being the best support a person could ever ask for. I found an article online that was addressed to partners of people with PTSD, and it brought tears to my eyes because it described PTSD so well. Here's a link - print it out for him:

http://www.sandf.org/articles/PTSD...

I suggest finding a quiet time when you can broach the subject. He'll probably feel uncomfortable - guys are a little scared about hearing what's in a woman's mind . But men love to have a job and be needed. This article and the discussion you have with him afterward will tell him what he can do to help, and you'll probably find that he's somewhat relieved to know there's something he can do.

Before I brought this to my hubby, I read it twice, then took some notes. I made a list of things that I related to in the article (things that triggered me, etc) and a list of what I'd really like him to do when I experienced these triggers or symptoms. For example -

If there's a scene on tv of a rape, change the channel right then. It will get my attention, it will show me you're watching out for me, and may prevent me from having a flashback.

If I have to go to the doctor (another trigger for me) don't sit or stand between me and the door. I need to know there's an escape route. If the doctor seems aggressive, tell them to back off... I may not be able to, but will be terrified. You're like my knight in shining armor.


My husband has learned ways to distract me when I get triggered... He's great at inserting stupid jokes, making faces, etc., that I can't help but be distracted by, and he's pulled me out of several flashbacks by just being there and persistently making silly comments about other subjects that draw me back out of the past.

He's become my advocate with doctors, making them listen to me and ask my permission before doing things, and helps me in a thousand ways all the time.

He will still tell you he doesn't understand what it's like to have PTSD, but he's realized he doesn't have to understand it in order to help me with it. He's truly become my hero.

Feel free to print this post to show your husband, too. I wish you both all the best.

Hugs,
Wistala

Many doctor do not understand. I am not real sure why they went to school. I guess because they are book smart. Many do not have the compassion that is needed for this type of emotional pain, nor do they understand.
Your spouse needs to be your backbone in all this. Your Rock of course is "God". A spouse who can just offer a little bit of support, would just be enough, I think. Take care! nsm

Sorry to hear about the many challenges, decisions and issues we face. This disorder strikes and in ways which make it difficult to be happy. Many times I really hit bottom and wondered if I would ever get better. All things are in flux and the brain can rewire and mold itelf into something different.

There are therapists who use mindfulness in therapy. It is a collaboration of patient and thrapist. The patient has a part in his or hers healing. They both face what unfolds with that uncertainty and presence of mindfulness. The therapist is there to support and let the patient find their relationship with their thougths and emotions.

I believe there is a way to improve and be happy again. I have lived that path and have joy again at times. I still have issues however my nervous system is under my focus now and we are calm and trying to live a life with ease. I also try to help others to find a life with ease.

Thanks for all of the support guys!!! I'm still trying to get my husband to 'care' about some of this, but I guess if it isn't happening to him then he just doesn't relate. This, for me, is hard to understand.
Is it because he's male and I'm female???

I think some of it that he is male, since women are generally more empathetic and naturally nurturing. others find it hard to comprehend because it is not like a broken bone they can see. It is abstact and confusing and worries some or all who put up with us.

It does make it easier to have support. Scotr you can heal on your own I bet if your husband sees some improvement and comments on it you can ask for support then. He might come along but I guess you will have to lead on this one. Men can be bad at nurturing. good luck

Men are from Mars and women are from Venus :-p

(Actually that's an incredibly insightful book!)

Men are very visual/tactile... and they are trained to fix things. If they can't see it, touch it, or fix it - it either doesn't exist, or they're very puzzled by it.

Hang in there. With or without his help, you WILL get through this. And remember, you can come on here and rant or ask for support anytime.

~ Wistala