What is Physical Emotional Abuse
Abuse is a general term for the treatment of someone that causes some kind of harm (to the abused person, to the abusers themselves, or to someone else) or is unlawful or wrongful....
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I've met a smart nice guy. Didn't initiate anything. He started talking to me. I know he's flirting.
I know it's too early to date. But, this started me thinking. He's nice. I'm looking for flaws. I catch myself thinking maybe he's a little wimpy. Too kind. Soft. WTF ... WARNING WARNING I realize that I like bad boys and fixer-uppers. I MUST STOP. I must NEVER choose a bad boy or fixer-upper again. NEVER NEVER. Oddly, nice guys scare me. How do we stop that ... if you've had a life-time being with the broken, needy types? Know it. Recognize it. Stop it. Or never talk to another man again. Also, I'm always concerned that alll men are in it for one thing ... sex. Not good. But, drumroll... why is it every time I find a man slightly attractive I think of sleeping with him? :) Or, actually, my body says "what if ..." I am so far away from my marriage. But, puh-lease ... that sex thing is a little weird. Posted on 11/06/09, 06:11 pm |
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Ummm ... not at all weird to me. I have much the same thing. I have no trust left for guys, and I don't seem to find the nice ones attractive. As for the sex thing - I think I have a remarkable ability to only ever want what I don't have!
In my case, I am just (when the time is right, which is not yet for a lot of reasons) going to try to meet and go out with lots of guys, nothing serious etc etc - and not leading them on or lying to them - just so I can try to find out what it is I really want, while at the same time trying very hard to see the red flags I sailed right past before. 
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I think women think about sex just as much as men. I know as a 40+ year old woman, I sure do. As educated as we are we are still critters in the forest sizing each other up and thinking about possibilities.
I have decided to never again date an artist or musician...done with them. No bad boys, no fixer-uppers. I am looking for a grown and professional man who knows how to take care of himself. Tonight I have a date with an engineer, my first date since my bf and I broke up. I too am vigilant for red flags. I think this hyper-sensitivity to douches is good for us. I think recognizing and leaving abusers gives us a better moral compass.
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