What is Physical Emotional Abuse
Abuse is a general term for the treatment of someone that causes some kind of harm (to the abused person, to the abusers themselves, or to someone else) or is unlawful or wrongful....
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I have to share - about being broken
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There's an upside to being broken ...
With each fix ... you're born a little bit. With them we die a little bit with each abuse. I celebrate each little bit of new life. Posted on 11/04/09, 01:11 pm |
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yes, it feels good to be free and to heal and be finally moving forward in a better healthier more hopeful direction. He was killing my soul. hugs 
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Although I have been completely out of my home for almost 3 months now with NC (except 3 brief emails to discuss finances), I realize how much freedom I have.
Freedom to make any recipe I want (I love to cook, but I had to pre-screen pretty much anything because I was not "allowed" to make soups, anything with vegetables, or basically anything that he didn't like). Freedom to watch Bravo channel and girly TV shows whenever I want. Freedom to go to run errands on my own. Freedom to eat breakfast for dinner! Freedom to take an hour long bubble bath and not have to worry about him getting upset. Freedom to blast the music I like while driving without him either turning it off or berating me for liking that type of music. Freedom to wear my ugly (but oh so comfortable) nightgown that my aunt got me (it's a little hideous). And, one of the best parts....freedom to spend time with my family and friends that he only said negative things about for so long. I know I have a ways to go yet...but, I feel like each day, I get a little piece of myself back, too. It's amazing.
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What do you do when you had all those good feelings and knew it was good to be out, but then went back. I am in the depths of depression again, for letting him back in. Now I feel like I am starting all over.
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I know it's kind of hijacking prachelle's post, which I totally agree with and which is so uplifting ... but I also like the idea of making a list of some of the freedoms - many of Scout's I can totally relate to, but here's just a couple of others.
The freedom to go to bed whenever I want - and not worry about what he will do to me. Not only the freedom to go out when I want, but the freedom to stay in if I want. The freedom to wear my hair the way I want to. The freedom to tidy up, knowing that the flat surface I just found will stay found. The freedom to work when I need to, and slack off when I can - without being criticised for either wasting my life working, or jeopardising my life by not working hard enough (yet another of those "can't win" situations). The freedom to put money away or spend it - while knowing that the mortgage money won't just disappear the day before it's due. The freedom to smile - without being asked what evil purpose lies behind the "smirk". There are soooo many others, but that will do as a starter.
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Huge affirmation Prach!
Liv, wow, just so wow!
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I have often said, that everything he did to hurt me, to strand me, to isolate me, made me stronger, more independent of him......
Pretty much backfired. One big huge fart in his face, LOL. Hugs...
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Hockeymom ... have you seen Monty Python Holy Grail ... the fart thing ... I fart in your general direction.
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