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Do Abusers EVER take any ownership of their abuse?
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I just got to thinking about how my abuser not only took zero ownership of how abusive he is, but how he also has found a way to conveniently excuse himself from it in the present.

When I last spoke with him about it, he basically just said, "I'm turning over a new leaf, so I have let go of the past. I've made a lot of mistakes, but I can't do anything to change the past. So, I'm just moving on." It infuriated me so much, because it just felt like he was giving himself a free pass for all the abuse he heaped upon me! Before you can excuse yourself, you need to own up to what you did, ask for forgiveness, and then *maybe* you can move on to letting go of it. It was like the final insult.

So guys, have any of your abusers ever taken ownership for their abusiveness? Or is that unheard of?
Posted on 01/25/13, 11:07 am
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Reply #41 - 05/12/13  8:41pm
" I'm need to revisit my answer from page 1 - the woman I was with previously was incapable of taking ownership of anything she may have caused.

The woman living with me now, whom has exhibited abusive behavior rivaling my ex, is VERY aware of her role. While she hasn't quite come out and issued a tearful apology, sh has made statements to the affect that she knows her behavior is causing me pain. Today, she was reading from a meditation book, and it was talking about how some people sabotage their won relationships when things get too close. And she told me that is what she does, and that is what she did with me. It seems to really cause her pain the hurt she has put on others and especially towards herself. Hearing those words out of someone who has abused is both a little creepy and a little comforting. Creepy in that they are aware, yet have to fight themselves from acting that way, but comforting in that some abusers want to take steps to correct their bad behavior. "

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