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please help me ####******#####
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I don't know what to do. Last night my husband pushed me to the floor and I hit the fridge and fell on the heater. It left a big bruise on my arm. He did this once before, he pushed me in the tub trying to get my cellphone from me so I wouldn't call the cops. I fell hard enough to get a bone confusion which feels like a broken arm but it isn't actually broke. I have a 3 yr old by my previous husband and a 6 month old by my current one. He yelled at the top of his lungs at my little baby last night saying "Brice shut up" because he was crying trying to fight his sleep and he yelled like 3 feet away from him. He has put holes throught the wall, closet and broke a bunch of glass and, a highchair. And when he picked up and threw the highchair and broke it a piece flew over and hit my 6 month old that was playing on the floor. I hurried up and grabbed him b/c he was crying and I told my husband "you hit him" and he said no I didnt. He didn't have any remorse at all. He didn't even feel bad afterwards. He has anger issues and I don't know what to do to make him better. I do have jealousy issues and I don't really trust him. He lied to me a couple weeks ago about pills he was hiding norcos which is like vicodin. He had surgery for a cyst in his wrist and took over 80 pills in 2weeks which is ridiculous I think. And he said he's sorry and he would never lie again and then he lied to me the very next day about how many motrin he had in his mouth. I don't wanna ruin my 6 month olds life. I left my other husband and now he has nothing to do with our 3 yr old. And I feel its all my heart. My mom was beat on by my dad for 5 yrs. She said it just gets worse. My mom would hurt him if she knew what he was doing. I don't wanna end up like her :( please help idk what to do.
Posted on 07/11/12, 08:10 am |
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I really want to echo what beansprout said.
You don't have to leave unless you are ready to. You won't be judged here either way. But if this new pill doesn't work, he is incredibly dangerous and you need to have a "back up" plan. Just in case. Better to be over prepared for something that doesn't happen, than have it happen and be totally unprepared. Take care of yourself and your kids. And DO call the cops if it happens again. For your sake and for the sake of the children, zero tolerance. 
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Please get out NOW! You and your children do not deserve this!! He is dangerous!
It's not your job to make him better....and his issues are NOT your fault. Like Ilene said, contact a women's shelter in your area. Here is another number for you....1-800-799-7233. It's the National Domestic Violence Hotline. If possible, get a prepaid cell phone to prevent him from tracking your calls and possibly your whereabouts on a cell phone bill.
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Please go to a shelter they will help you with every thing you need, I know you may be scared of going to a shelter, But they are not bad and you will be protected and safe, He will continue to be abusive they always are and it just gets worse and worse, They will find you housing, Give you the counseling you need every thing, Like every one is saying on here, Please get out you deserve more then what he is doing to you
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Definitely consider the women's shelter idea. They are such a great support.
You are being abused. Your children are being abused. You will NOT be ruining your children's lives by leaving. In fact you may be saving their lives. Your husband's behavior is not only totally unacceptable, it is criminal. You cannot 'make him better'. Nobody can change another person. You can only change yourself. Children need a nice big store of happy childhood memories to help them build psychological resilience. Maybe you can enlist the help of other family members to help you with your little ones? For now, please make a plan of escape and keep safe.
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Thank you everyone I'm so happily overwhelmed that all of you care so much....I do have a place to go... My mom and dad want me to move back home... There I would have a room and a room for my kids. I do have a backup plan. And if this pill don't help him and he rages out one more time I'm gone. I will leave when hes at work and he won't even be expecting it. I guess its just a wait and see for now. I really do appreciate everything.
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PLEASE GET OUT NOW FOR THE SAKE OF YOURSELF AND THOSE BABIES!
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Glad you have a back up plan, and happy that you are saying one more rage and that's it.
Stick to it. One more rage means it's not changing. And you know what? If you are wrong, and he really DOES change, getting out and getting your kids safe doesn't prevent him changing and proving his change to you.
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I'm glad you have a backup plan too--he sounds really dangerous, and you and your kids don't deserve that.
If I may suggest, I don't think you should tell him your ultimatum--one more rage and I leave. Sometimes people get more violent when they think that their target is leaving. Of course, maybe you already told him--and that's why it's good to have an emergency plan for if he does get into a very bad rage--like, which exit you can get out of and having a bag packed. Here's one list of considerations.. http://www.thehotline.org/get-help/... Good for you for taking the steps you have!
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It's good he is on meds. But I'm telling you sweetie another rage will happen. Please get you & your kids out. There were so many rages that I honestly thought I would die. By the grace of God I didn't. Please please get out & go to your parents. I know have so many back & neck problems from my years of abuse that I have to take meds daily for the pain. If you need to talk Pls send me a message.
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Hello my name is Janine and I just got done reading your story and it broke my heart . It felt as If I was reading about the life I live. It's not fun and it will only get worse. I have been with my boyfriend for 18 yrs and we have to handsome boys 12 and 4 . My oldest has lived thru most of the horrible days where daddy is yelling at mommy or putting his hands on her . He has tried to come to my defence but in the end he is becoming his father in the way he not only treats me but his brother and other people around him . I should have left a long time ago and may today my son would be in a happier state of mimd. I will be hear to listen and not judge if you ever need someone to talk with . This site these people have done so much for me with my mental state. I hope to keep in touch to let me know how things are
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