Pet Bereavement Support Group

Hello, I'm so sad for you I know your heart is breaking. Our pets give us so much. Their presence becomes such a part of who we are. You did the most kind and unselfish act for your little one. That takes the most unselfish kind of love. When you see that kind of suffering and the real hard choice comes, do I make her hold on which would be for me because she doesn't have any real quality of life or do I let her go before more pain in suffering comes to her. The more we the greater the sorrow. But you said it beat, you were so blessed to love the way you loved her and so blessed to have shared your life with her. You gave her a wonderful life and you allowed her to leave peacefully. You are a good and caring lady. The best choice stinks for us but is best for our little loves. Take good care. Hugs and hugs, hugs to you.

As another lover of kitties, l am so sorry that you have lost Minbu. My animals become such an integral part of my life that I can tell you that I have (and will again) react in just the same way. This is a long and involved process. Be patient with yourself and know that you are normal.. You are a kind and loving soul.
Hoping your days will be better,
Love,
Jan

I do understand your loss completely. I too owned a Burmese cat named Zachary. He lost his six year battle with kidney failure in May of this year at age 25. I miss him so much it hurts! We were so close. As I am certain you know the burmese are so loving and devoted. He was my "snugglezach". I too had much regret and second thoughts when I put him to sleep, but I knew we were at the end. I just didn't want to let go. He is buried next to his garden where we used to have picnics near every summer. He just loved sunning himself, sitting near the pond, and just being with me. He slept with me every night and snuggled and hugged me every day. Who could not love that!

Don't be too hard on yourself. You did what was in his best interest. It was the final and most difficult act of love. Here is a poem I had for Zachary....

I miss you so much; my special friend
I ask myself each day; if the pain will ever end
Your loss is so hard; for one person to bear
because we were a team; an inseparable pair

You were by my side; when I got up each day
waiting so patiently; in your special way
You were there each night; you were always with me
I knew you loved me; this I could see

You always knew; if I was having a bad day
you'd snuggle up close; in my arms you would lay
If that didn't work; you would sit on my lap for a while
Until you succeeded; and got me to smile

One way or another you would brighten my day
like only you could; in your own loving gentle way
You gave me a lifetime; of memories to hold
through all the years ahead; even when I am gray and old

I promise I'll see you; again one day
when we'll be together again; this I can say
Your loss is a cross; I will just have to bear
because you and I know; we’re an inseparable pair

Thank you all for all your supportive comment. It really does help to have sympathetic people out there who understand what I am going through and all the feelings, guilt, regrets etc that go with it. I have a constant aching knot of grief at the pit of my stomach. I knew when this day came it would hurt, but not this much, I miss my little Minbu SOOOO much - she was such a big part of my life, And she loved me back too. I miss her cheeky, sweet face, her purr, her nuzzling nose, her cuddles - I could go on! I know this will ease in time. But for now it is still so very raw. Your replies are a comfort - they make me cry more but in a good way. Thank you.

You are right. You know that eventually the day will come when you must say goodbye to your pet but when it happens nothing can prepare you for the intense grief and emptiness you feel. My dog Jasper died 8 months ago and I can tell you that the missing part does not go away. I don't think I ever will go a day where I don't miss him and that is okay. I want to remember him but now I'm able to focus on the good times we had together instead of his final days. That will come with time and as you move through the grieving process. I still cry on occasion but I have been able to move on and I don't feel that intense pain and emptiness anymore. I know I did the right thing for him as he was suffering. It's never easy letting them go but it is the kindest thing we can do for them. I'm so sorry for your loss. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

Hi, I'm so very sorry for the loss of your Beloved Minbu. I understand how you are feeling and can image all what you must be going through with your family.It's been a little over a year since I had to put my 19 yr. old Puss Cat to sleep. I thought I never would get over having to put the "Joy of My Life" to sleep." Minbu Will Always Be In Your Heart " "Minbu's Spirit Will Live On".


Big Hugs,

S A R A H

It is hard to give the greatest gift of all in the end.. peace. I too had to put down a dear tabby "Cassie" back in 2003 at 19 years old. She pleaded with me to "please let me go".. she had become blind, deaf, and I aided her to the litter box, the food dish, then she was finally willing out. She stopped eating, couldn't even get up to walk anymore.. and I AGONIZED with that final decision! Another cat I had "kelly" was 21 years old, and "willed" herself out where-as I was fortunate enough to have her die at home on my lap! As recently as thursday October 29th '09 for the now second time EVER I had to put down another tabby. She was probably 6 months or less old, not even had her first heat when she became violently ill and had begun struggling to breathe!! After x-rays and such I was informed that beyond phnemonia she had a rare disease called FIP? I again, made the heart-wrenching decision to put this kitty down.. and I am still saddened by the whole ordeal. Still crying at the drop of hat. Even having had this little girl (found in a ditch along side of the road)only months.. she managed to wrap around this heart and make it her own!! I feel she was soooo cheated, to die so soon... I offered her a good home and did all I could-- but the unfairness is still all I seem to think of. Each kitty, their OWN personality, ..their own way of showing love and adoration. The deep numbing pain is always the same with each loss. We pick ourselves up and keep going- there's still more kittys that NEED US! The companionship, the love, the memories far exceed any focus on "the end" of life HERE..

I'm sad for you, I know how painful this is. You did the best you could for your kitty to keep her safe from suffering. One thing I have learned is that feeling guilt is a common theme for all of us who have lost a pet so try not to blame yourself. Regarding the deep pain, looking back I have had a lot of pets and been sad when they died. My last cat Corie was one that I had been solely responsible for since she was a kitten. Something about that makes them closer because they take on a role more like a child or other close family member. They are not just any cat. You and Minbu were lucky to have fifteen wonderful years together. She will always be with you in spirit. Here is a poem that captures how I feel about my cat. It makes me cry but I love it anyway because it makes me feel like she is still nearby. Maybe you will like it too.

Little Ghost cat,
Your footsteps pit-pat
In the hallway of my mind
The kiss of air, whisper-soft purr;
I hear the echos of your purr;
See your pouncing shadow everywhere....
And smile through my tears.
Author Unknown