Parents of Children with ADHD Support Group

hello and welcome. My son was Dx with adhd, we tried ritalin while it helped him focus it made his fits worse. however they think it may be something more than adhd. right now he's off meds, and we will see what his new psych says next week. I don't know of many who have had success without meds.

hi my daughter was diagnosed at 6. Now 13 and still on meds that seem to work most of the time. When off them she is an uncontrollable child. We now has a psychologist and psychiatrist on board as they feel that there is more to the issue than just ADHD. I have not known anyone who has not had their child on some sort of med at some stage. Good luck with what you are doing. Every child is different and therefore their treatment is different. What may be right for us may not be right for you.

I agree with TNTX2. I have to admit being totally against medicating my son in the beginning. He's 10 and was diagnosed when he was 8. I wanted to try whatever strategies besides medication first. I tried making changes to his diet, IEP's at school, occupational therapy, I got a great therapist, we did rewards charts and several other behaviour modification strategies. Unfortunately though, while some things did work on some level, none worked enough and he was suffering so much, academically, socially, mentally.. it was horrible. So this past April I finally put him on meds, and it was that that made all the difference for my son.

I don't want to discourage you.. just as TNTX2 said, what works for one may not work for another, and every med and strategy works differently for each child too. But just keep an open mind to the meds if your other options don't work. Because although I am ok with the fact that we tried other strategies first, I do now regret waiting so long.. because I saw my son suffer for a long time. I wish you luck, and welcome! :)

Like the people above, I went the gammut with my son. Tried diet, even herbal supplements and homeopathy. Eliminated sugar, all refined flour, etc, etc. The only thing that worked was structure, almost obsessive consistency in routine and discipline and most of all, ritlin. He started ritlin at 5, on a low dose, never had to increase very much, and was on until in his teens when he just refused to take it and he once again became unmanageable and oppositional.

While on the ritlin he was able to do well in his school work, was above his grade level, could stay on task, and his tantrums were kept at a low roar. It was an absolute life-saver for him and for me!

Also like the others, I would ask you to keep an open mind about the meds. Understand as well, that each and every person's story is different. You must write your own. What worked for us may not work for you!

Good luck! God bless!

My son is 8. He was dx'd at age 6 with mild ADHD. Because he has some other medical conditions which require the use of an EpiPen, which is contraindicated when using stuimulants,(as well as my husband's absolute fear of medication) my son is not on any medication.
Here is what we have done:

1. Behavior charts and rewards and consequences systems. Many of them. Changing when needed. In conjunction with the teachers. I don't think he ever gets "better" with them, but he certainly uses them as motivation to not get any worse! And absolute consistency with rewards and consequences.
2. Making sure he gets enough sleep. I am EXTREMELY lucky -- my son does not like to stay up late, and if he is tired he asks to go to bed. We were on vacation at Disney World, and he had no set bedtime, and he STILL was insisting on being in bed by 9:30. Now, if his father convinces him to stay up late for a few days in a row, he really gets cranky and has a downhill slide ( his Dad is a night owl, and sometimes forgets how much sleep my son and I both need).
3. COGMED - This is a brain training program that has gotten some good clinical evaluation. We did this earlier this year. For the first time this year, my son was having trouble in school. Well, after COGMED, his teacher said she no longer had any academic concerns. His ability to remember things and make sense of things really kicked into high gear since this program. To both me and my husband and many of his teachers, he seemed to mature an entire year in about 3 months after this program. However, it did NOTHING for hyperactivity -- its not supposed to, by the way =-- but I want to be clear that we still have a busy, talkative child.
3. I consider myself extremely lucky in that my son does not have temper tantrums, and when he tries to tell lies, he often ends up crying and confessing (which I do myself.) He can be a bit of a smart aleck, but my husband kind of encourages this. He is not disrespectful nor is he willfully disobedient at school -- only with us, and only a little bit, nothing out of the ordinary. I don't know how I got so lucky on that part, but I thank God for it every day. Based on what his teachers and counselors and others tell me, he does not have any social issues either-- again, I thank God for this every day, because he used to be aggressive, and I am really not sure how or why this stopped, except for maybe....
4. Martial Arts -- Martial arts provides my son with a controlled environment to be physical, to practice, practice, practice--- to combine mental and physical energy-- he does this three times a week-- Im not sure that the two are necessarily related, but he stopped being aggressive at around the same time that we started martial arts.
4. He does get some classroom modifications at school. He is permitted to stand at his desk instead of sit, his teachers are encouraged to send him on errands if possible, he is to be placed at the front of the class near the teacher, and the teacher is supposed to call on him often to keep him engaged and focused. He goes to private school, so he does not have an IEP or 504 per se, but this is kind of their equivalent of the 504. He has some environmental adaptations, but no academic adaptations -- so far, he has not needed them. His academic skills are above grade level -- that might be because of the school he goes to. An earlier psychologist who evaluated him for ADHD told us that whatever they are doing they are doing well, because his performance scores were all superior, even higher than his potential performance scores. I think private school-- while not possible for all, of course -- can be beneficial for ADHD children.
5. Instead of constantly fighting him to be "normal", I gave up and realized he is not normal-- but that's ok. So, when we are at church, if he starts fidgeting or can't stop talking, I send him to the bathroom. So what if he goes three times? He always comes back, and then he does listen better. At the grocery store, instead of yelling "Stay in the cart, stay near me, don't touch that"-- its his job to get all the groceries and put them in the cart. He even climbs the shelves when he needs to. We're loud, yes, and the grocery store personnel know us very well-- but he helps, and he has fun, and grocery shopping is a breeze for me now. When he keeps talking incessantly, we will say "Son, you do realize that you are talking so much no one can hear you, right?" and then we will all laugh. In short, I changed my perspective. He does not have to perform perfectly, but he has to try -- and I can tell when he is trying -- to keep better self control. So that's what we ask him to do -- he must put forth the effort. His effort grades in school went from needs improvement/ satisfactory to outstanding/ good when we changed our perspective about trying. It also made for a much happier kid.

Sorry for the long answer, but I wanted to share what we do without meds. I am not anti-med (as mentioned above, my husband is, but whatever on that) -- but until my son really cannot get along without them, we won't be considering them ( and at that point, even my husband agreed that we will need to consider it.) If my son was not happy, did not have friends, was not doing alright in school academically, then I would feel that meds are required. So I will use him as the benchmark for when meds are needed--

irm1021,
THANK YOU for you long answer! This is the first response that is encouraging to what we are trying. I am way more concerned about the focus part because it is affecting school. He is in a private school and working with us. I did hear about the COGMED program and investigated it, but since I didn't know anyone who had done it, I was skeptical. I hate that most drs you talk to beleive the only way to help is meds and therapy. I get the therapy part, but I'm really hesitant on the med part. We have invested a lot of time and money in this and I want to see it through. Thanks for the encouragement!

Is he having behavior issues? My son was diagnosed with ADHD in the spring and we are not ready to do meds. We want to wait until all other efforts have been exhausted. I had to hire an advocate to help with the school district because they are required to accommodate him. We may now be sending him to an out of district school on the districts dime!! Meds are not a magic fix. Other interventions should be exhausted first.