What is Obsessive Compulsive Disorder OCD

Obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) is a psychiatric disorder, more specifically, an anxiety disorder. OCD is manifested in a variety of forms, but is most commonly characterized b...

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Wow is all i can say..
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Hi everyone,

I have not been dxed with OCD. I have been diagnosed with anxiety issues and depression. My Anxiety started from drugs, pot to be exacte. Gave me a panic attack which developed into a panic disorder...I did my own little form of CBT and that's no longer any issue. Going through a divorce right now, married 5 year's, have been cheated on multiple times..It's been tough. I took some time off work to "work on myself" and ended up drinking and smoking pot for 4 months non stop, "self medicate" Ugh. anyway, just a little history.

This evening my anxiety started REALLY! heavy when i decided i was going to go to bed. I notice when im tired you get that dizziness feeling...ussually gives me anxiety. Anyway...(still very anxious, so bare with my rambling please =/ ) As soon as my anxiety starts i run to these boards. Also as soon as my anxiety starts i ALWAYS, and i mean ALWAYS think im going to start hallucinating or hearing voices....I have a massive fear of being schizophrenic as my two uncles are (Both triggered by Acid and random other drugs..and there enviroment growing up) I always thought this was part of my anxiety and probably feeds it like crazy. I always LOOK for hallucinations and i always keep thinking "Was that sound acctually real???". I always passed these very intrusive thoughts off as anxiety.

I came across an interesting article about Pure O. Myself, like many other people always associated OCD with repetitious actions...Phsyical actions. But I totally see my mental actions repeating over...and over...and over. I always over analyise my health. Always think im schizo. And I always thinking about my Ex wife when im anxious.

I'm not sure but after reading alot of post's on this board tonight...I think i may have figured something out here...

Any thoughts? =/

Thanks so much..sorry for the rambling
Posted on 11/04/09, 12:11 am
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Reply #1 - 11/04/09  7:58am
" Well..first off I think you need to work hard on quitting weed and drinking. I am currently on the process of doing that, and the last 3 weeks I have felt a lot better. I totally understand how the weed makes you feel.. it i wouldnt doubt it if it freaks me out even more... It's just common sense to stop. Yet.. the ocd tells me it will make things better, it's just an irrational thought. Theres not much more i can tell you, Im learnin on the whole situation. Try to force yourself to stay clean. Then let me know how you feel. "
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Reply #2 - 11/04/09  8:17am
" Hey there,

I've beeen clean for about a month now, no booze, no smoke. I do feel alot better! This whole thing is pretty confusing...def need to make an appt with my P Doc soon =/ "
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Reply #3 - 11/04/09  8:54am
" One of the biggest things that freaked me out was.. when I smoked... my mind would race, and I would think of many events that effected me in the past, and I would think about insecurities... it actually made me think I was crazy. I know... im not crazy, but im tellin you man... I've never been soo afraid... the last few times I smoked and went into deep thought. its just not worth it... at least in my case... I am better without it. "
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Reply #4 - 11/05/09  9:40pm
" Well, I've talked to my psychologist about smoking cannabis and its effects. I guess you can get depressed/anxiety by it as well as it can relieve it, but what I noted he said that if you were (genetically I guess) disposed for getting schizophrenia smoking a lot of weed could trigger it.

So I think not smoking weed would be best for you. :) "
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Reply #5 - 11/05/09  11:44pm
" When I smoke, all fucking hell breaks loose. I turn into a spiritual traveler exploring the deep dark places and the infinite possibilities of my mind. I go insane. That shit is so powerful. Respect it!

So just my thoughts on anxiety. You said that you have been diagnosed with anxiety. To me Anxiety is Anxiety and it can take form as phobias, obsessions, panic, etc..... Plus, "They" say it is common for anxiety disorders to co-exist with other anxiety disorders, and depression for that matter. It sounds like to me that you are obsessing. I am pretty sure that obsessing about becoming Schizophrenic is fairly common for OCDers.

There has been "Pure-O" debates, if you will, on here. Mental compulsions also exist. Check it!

Yah, OCD is commonly viewed as that checking, hoarding, counting, touching, washing and rearranging disorder. There is that entirely different realm where the thinking is on certain topics, if you will, and there is a lack of physical compulsions or rituals.

I would see a professional on this.

-Andy "
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Reply #6 - 11/06/09  11:30am
" Thanks for the reply's.

I have stopped smoking pot. Dont feel the need or want to smoke it either. =)

Thrash, i always chaulked my schizo obsession to Anxiety but the obsession trying to convince myself I AM! Schizo is what causes my anxiety. After some very heavy thinking about the last year and a half...I have been really obsessed with Schizo, to the point i think i know so much i could DX it!...lol. It can be very frustrating at times but im just trying to keep telling myself,"Hey, its just the OCD" over and over...eventually i'll calm down and go a while before the intrusive "crazy" thoughts come back.

I am def going to be making an appt with my Pdoc and let him know whats going on.

Thanks everyone =) "
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Reply #7 - 11/06/09  7:04pm
" Wes,

Check out this post on page two of the OCD boards. You are not alone in this obsession. -Andy

Title: The fear of "going insane" is getting very bad


Ive posted on these boards before with my fear of having schizophrenia. My psychiatrist has told me several times I do not have it, nor will i likely ever have it. But, if things were that easy, I wouldnt be posting on an OCD board. My mind constantly races with mental images, random sounds and songs. Its very annoying. Im constantly checking for hallucinations, which ive never had, but still check for, and I spend hours reading about symptoms. I seriously want to quit school and spend all day in bed. I am usually in full blown panic all day and its awful. Im seriously considering dropping out of college.
Posted on 10/28/09, 11:10 pm "

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