What is Multiple-Myeloma
Multiple myeloma (also known as MM, myeloma, plasma cell myeloma, or as Kahler's disease after Otto Kahler) is a type of cancer of plasma cells, immune system cells in bone marrow ...
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Tuesday November 24, 2009
Rambling Stories
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I feel so so depressed and desperate this morning. I don't know what to do with myself to be honest, I've not slept or anything yet so technically I've been up almost 24hrs. I have cut myself too, many times, some deep, some not. They're bandaged up for now, but its still not enough, I'm still not satisfied. I can feel something buliding up inside me, and I'm not sure what...
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I feel so extremely low, have done practically all day long-no surprise. I have cut today, actually this morning about 7am, in an obvious but not so obvious place. I cut the top of my right foot, seems that I can cut deep here, and the pain is very minimal. Its an obvious place, but not somewhere someone would look for cuts/scars.
I feel depressed, but numb, like I want to die. Its like I ha...1 Recommendation1 Comment -
Since my lastentry so much has happend. Where do I begin....My doctor thinks that I may have Lupus, but I haven't let that affect me. I think I'm still caught up in Chloe. Next month would have been her arrival. I find myself getting into really bad mood swings as May gets closer and closer. I wish she was going to be here!! I still hate seeing pregnant women makes me wanna crawl un...1 Recommendation2 Comments
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Sept a5 2008 haven't been able to write much.... I get so sick.. muscle tone is gone... I was looking at my arms awhile ago no muscle tone left... my arms look so thin.... hard to stand up straight back hurts too much... have to stand alittle at atime... last year at this time I was working full time feelling good I thought... my personal goal for tommorow not to be sick to my stomach.....1 Recommendation1 Comment
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For as long as I can remember, I've not let myself be optimistic about anything. The light at the end of the tunnel? For me, it's just a train coming at me, and I'm on the tracks. I know that this outlook was born out of a response to consistent disappointment and abandonment as a child. Hell, without a doubt it was and is a survival technique. Unfortunat...1 Recommendation9 Comments
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Tom is having issues now with neuropathy. I'm afraid this may interfere with his occupation so I am wondering if this is permanent. He is so reluctant to call the dr to report it. He claims it comes and goes but what if it's permanent.. I haven't kept up with it like I should as I have started school for Respiratory Therapy and the course is so intense that I've been distracted. H...1 Recommendation4 Comments
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Life has been keeping me quite busy these days and I haven't much time to write these days.
So here it is, I have finished the first term of my course in school and am very happy for myself. But yet, I can't enjoy like I want.
Tom takes up a lot of my energy these days. I have heard the term: the hamster syndrome and how Tom conveys hamster like behavior. He thinks in circles and can never ...1 Recommendation -
Okay, we have two cats. I change their box regularly but it's strange... they usually hang around the children but one of them is obsessed with Tom. This cat has no time for me on the usual but will climb all over Tom and seek his attention, a lot! So, my question is, is this cat able to sense Tom's illness? He seems to come around when Tom's at his lowest. I am baffled by this behavi...1 Recommendation2 Comments
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Thank God for everyone who has offered advice, encouragement and experience with this Multiple Myeloma journey. I just needed to say that to let everyone know how much they have helped. Strength in numbers is what I say...
Having said that, Tom is complaining of phantom pain. He says that some areas of his body are painful to the touch. Could this be a part of the neuropathy or is there something ...1 Recommendation -
Now it seems that things just can't move fast enough. In the beginning the doc was "we should've started treatment last month" but now, it's a creepy crawly status.
Okay, so we understand Tom needs more chemo but shouldn't that be happening like, yesterday? Where's the sense of urgency now?
Tom's been frustrated so badly by his pain that it's straining our rel...1 Recommendation5 Comments
