Lung Cancer Support Group

I have nonsmall cell lc that has spread to bone. My chemo was really rough on me the first 2 treatments, then it eased up quite a bit. I hope this is the case with your father.
I have been told by my doc that each person reacts differently to the drugs and to the stress this diagnosis is putting on him/her. That it will be a rollercoaster ride, with each day possibly completely opposite from the day before.
Praying helps me, even though I have never considered myself extremely religious. One of those luke warm Christians that won't get into heaven, you know. Hopefully I am heating up!
I will pray for you and your father. Hopefully you will feel some comfort.

Sorry about your dad..I lost my dad to lung cancer that spread to the bone and im now going through it with my husband..He has his good days and bad days..Its extremely difficult to watch him deteriorate..Its hard to say what to expect everyone is different..All I can say is try to be strong My prayers go out to you and your dad

I don't have a reply, but I too am need to know what to expect. My 35yo son diagnosed with Stage 4 lung cancer, early Jan. 2012, mets to brain and kidney. Was told there is no cure. has had 2 brain surgeries, gamma knife radiation, whole brain radiation and now is starting chemo. I need to know how the dying takes place. I know everyone is different, but if anyone is willing to share their what their loved one went thru i think it would help me. you do not need to share here, it is okay to send an email to me. Thanks, Steve

My story is very close, my dad is 64 and I dont know what to do for him.

I am wondering what to expect as well. Those questions have been going through my mind, since my mom (who just turned 80) was first diagnosed with stage 3 lung cancer, October 2010. Then a month later diagnosed her with stage 4 small cell lung cancer, when they performed surgery to remove the cancerous spot on her lung, discovering the cancer had spread to her lymph nodes. We were told at that time, after the surgery, that her prognosis was poor, that there was no cure.

Once she recovered from the surgery (Dec 2010), if my memory serves right, she had a CAT scan, PET scan and MRI (for her brain). In one of those scans, they discovered the cancer had spread to her bone. She had a couple spots, one in the pelvic bone area, and the other in the spine of her neck. At that visit, I asked what the typical prognosis is for her condition, and was told 9 months, but that can greatly vary from person to person, some it might only be a few weeks, and others a couple years. Because it is small cell, once it is triggered, can act very quickly and aggressively.

That was over a year ago, up until recently, she's been feeling pretty good. Very little to no pain. Thank goodness as that has been my primary concern, enduring the pain. My mom asked at appointment (when the diagnosed the cancer int he bones) how will she know if any onset of pain is from the cancer, or something else, and we were told, that with cancer, the pain will not come and go (back off, subside), but it will gradually, steadily increase over time...

Shortly after, my mom had radiation on the spine, as that was the area they were most concerned about containing, since if it were to grow larger, could cause problems paralysis, breathing, and/ or eating/ swallowing. They decided to leave the pelvic bone area alone, so they could compare to the spine area, to see if the radiation in the spine was effective.

About a month later (Feb 2011?), my mom started chemo, she did 6 trials, every three weeks, and did pretty well with it. This was a much more mild form of chemo, with much less side effects (not expect to cause severe nausea, or hair loss). She did pretty well on that, just had some mild tiredness by the 3 or 4th day after the chemo treatment. But by the 5 or 6th day, she pretty much felt back to her usual self. Based on follow up tests, the following months, it appeared the radiation on the spine helped (hardened the bone the way they hoped it would, to contain the growth). The also didn't find any more spots, bones or organs, areas of concern, no changes, hence they thought possibly the chemo had helped as well. When my mom was diagnosed with stage 4 cancer, we were told, chemo would not cure her cancer (make it go away), but temporarily slow the growth. And that eventually the cancer would become more resistent or immune to the chemo. So in this case, no change was good! And were very happy.

However in these follow up scans, they did not check the brain (only in the initial scan, shortly after she was diagnose). We were told, the brain is the more difficult are to detect cancer, and they don't like to expose the brain to any more radiation given off during the scan, than what is needed. Only if other symptoms started to show up.

Then in June 2011, my mom started noticing a slightly tender area on the upper (I think) right region of her skull. On a pain scale of 1-10, a 1 or 2. The pain was not enough to concern her, or to take tylenol, just noticeable, not painful. But then a month later, the tender area was still there. And she got another scan (neck up)? And they discovered the cancer had spread to the brain.

So she continued with her chemo treatments, and that seemed to be going fine. And then this fall, they did another scan (more high resolution-they didn't before, because my mom is allergic to iodine), and they noticed a slight thickening of the area in her pelvic bone. They didn't know if the cancer had grown, or if it was just more apparent because the scan was more high resolution. They also noticed a couple spots on her liver, but they didn't know if it was cancer, or just spots (that had been there all along).

After x-mas, my mom took a break from the chemo. To allow her body to rest. She and my dad took a trip to Florida, stayed there a couple months. Just to give you an idea, at 80 yrs old, my mom is still very mobile, and the cancer at point had not affected her, slowed her down much.

But when she game back, she had more scans, blood work, and they decided it was time to try a stronger chemo (to treat the whole body). They decided to do a couple trials, and then possibly treat the pelvic area with radiation. She just did the first trial a couple weeks ago, and she has been doing pretty poorly. I haven't seen her this bad since after her surgery (November 2010). She rarely gets out of bed, because she is a lot of pain, very tired. The side effects of the pain, unexpected. They've been giving her meds for the pain (can't remember what the name of it is, I'd know it if I heard it). And about a week later, her hair started falling out. In clumps. We knew her hair likely would fall out, a couple weeks before that, me, my sister, and mom shopped for wigs (which just came in), and some hats. Before this, my mom had a beautiful head of hair, very dark and shiny, with a slight curl to it (for 80 years old, she looks very youthful, I have more grey hair than she does-I am 43 yrs old). So it's been hard to see her go through that. She has been keeping the fallen out hair, in a pile on her desk. I suppose as a reminder of what she once had. It would be worth it, if we thought the chemo would work, but at this point seeing her bedridden, it makes one wonder if it is worth it?

When I talked to my mom last weekend, she confided to me, she didn't know if should go could or wuold go through the second trial of chemo. Because of the pain, and lack of mobility. She also is having a hard time remembering things. That same weekend, she had a very vivid dream, or hallucination, she said she was sitting up in bed, saw family, and was talking to them. She said she thought she was losing her mind. I told her, she didn't need to decide now, and if she decided she didn't want to go through with it again, that was ok. We'd fully support her. Since again, there is no cure for her cancer. The chemo will only stall the growth, for a temporary amount of time.

However, this past weekend, she has had a turn of heart, and has decided to go for the second trial, just get it over with, now that she knows the side effects. And see what happens. She is do her second trial tomorrow, and I am hoping an praying this time around goes better for her.

Overall, I think she is doing pretty well, since it's been a year and a half since her diagnosis. She's had very little pain, up until the chemo. At 80 yrs old, she's lived a very full life, and it is possible something else could take her. But my mom is my best friend, and thought of losing her, is very very hard. At least I've had some time to prepare for it. And try and spend as much time with her as I can (as well as my kids).

I am sorry about your father.... (((hugs)))

There comes a time to stop torturing the body with treatments, and only you people can decide when that is. Your loved one WILL be kept as painfree as possible, and allow her to talk about her impending transition if she so wishes. It will help you both. Death is not something that only the unfortunate few must go through, therefore, look at it, get to know it, and joyfully cross over when called home. You WILL miss her, of course. Just remember though, there is the reunion. Peace and love attend you all. xxxxxxxxxxxxxx