Interracial Relationships Support Group

I'm sorry to hear that they're putting so much pressure on you to get married. That must be rough. I've been with my boyfriend for 8 years, and we have 3 kids together. We've talked about getting married, but it's just not in our cards right now. I don't know. Would I love to get married? Sure. To him? Most definitely. I guess we're just not ready?

Regardless, don't let his family dictate your relationship. As long as you and him are together, and happy, that's what matters.

I guess I don't get it, after two years you should know if you want to marry or not and if you do then what is the hold up? I get so tired of hearing people say they can't afford to get married, this is even stupider if the two are already living together but even when you are not supporting one household is still cheaper then doing two unless one of you is a looser living off the parents.

Sorry that you are being pressured to get married. My husband asked me to marry him 2 months after we dated, and I said "NO". He thought I'd marry him asap just because we were friends over a year before dating and getting serious later on. I did'nt marry him until a year after we got serious and we knew we wanted to be together. His parents need to just understand that you two are not ready.

You might consider a fair compromise . . . get engaged! That might assuage his parents' concerns and take some of the pressure off of you both, while leaving you with the additional time you need to get financially and emotionally/mentally ready. I agree a bit with Georgia, that after 2 years, you should know. It's time to sh*t or get off the pot, as they say. But I also don't think that -- just because you KNOW -- you have to make the move right away. Weddings are stressful and expensive and I can understand putting it off for those reasons (or even eloping!). But what the parents want is to know that the right level of commitment to THE FAMILY (to being each others' family and being a part of each others' families) is there and I think you can show them that with an engagement (and just be clear that it may be a LONG engagement!).

I've been with my boyfriend for 4 years, we have a two year old and another on the way. Neither of us really have any desire to get married anytime soon, really marriage is just a piece of paper and a big headache, I consider us already married anyways. My parents are really old fashioned and asked me alot in the beginning of our relationship when we were going to get married, (because we had a kid together) I told them it wasn't number one on my list and it would have to wait. I had to explain this to them for the first two years, they left me alone after that.