Interracial Relationships Support Group

I thought this might be an interesting group to join. My mother(white) and my step-father(black) lived together from the time I was 9 until I was 17. I lived with my son's father(native american, black, hispanic)for many years. I also lived on and off with his mother(black) and his step-father(white). I raised my son who is all of the above. So I have had the perspective of living as a child, adult, mother, in situations where race was a part of the equation.
After reading some of the discussions here I feel sort of old and very sad and don't think I belong here. Frankly, I know that alot of things still go on, I have family members who still say things like "good hair" and favor light-skinned people. But the anger that people seem to harbor just gives power and validity to others. Although I so annoyed that there is still no box to check. I checked every one that applied when my son was little, and he did the same on college applications. If they said no, I would leave it blank.
I got called all kinds of names, from white girl or white bitch to nigger lover and everything in between. My son's father was(at best) perpetrating by being with me. I sat for six hours in a lock-up because a couple of cops didn't care for our attitude while we were walking down the street on the north rather than south side of the city.
But what I find really sad is that the people in relationships today are still allowing so much to be about race. It is there, it will always be there. But is it better? You better know it. That doesn't mean it is perfect. But unless the people involved get past it, they can't expect anyone else to.
Bi-racial children will always have a different experience than other children. If their parents and families can't be safe and secure, and support and show them that they are just as good, who will? There are some people in my family I haven't spoken to in 30 years, and never will again. You take me, my family and especially my child as a group and treat us right, or I don't need to know you. Not angry, just done.
Sorry if this is a rant, I surely don't mean to offend or make it sound like I know more or have been through more or any of that. Just an old-school perspective which maybe will give someone something to consider as they deal with this issue which seems like it will never die.
Posted on 05/30/09, 08:05 pm