What is Infertility
Infertility is the inability to naturally conceive a child or the inability to carry a pregnancy to term. There are many reasons why a couple may not be able to conceive, or may no...
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I CANT WIN.....
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For the last month or so, I've known about someone at work being pregnant! She works in a different dept then I do and on the other side of the building. We havent worked together but had a phone training session together(Im also a temp and get "looked at" like Im a nobody when it comes to things like this - I understand but damn). And we barely conversated that day. I noticed her rubbing her belly but "wanted" to think she was just full from lunch.....So, about 2 wks ago, my boss asked if there was anything that we needed to order before the pg. lady leaves for maturnity leave! Blah, blah, blah.....Deep down inside I wanted to cry but didnt let it bother me too much since I only saw this lady once.
Last week, there was a co email sent saying they would be having a baby shower/cookout for her on 11/4! Ok, no big deal. TODAY, all of a sudden, I feel not so nice & emotional. Some people in the dept I work in were passing a card around for her and skipped over me - Boy, I felt like a piece of shit!!! I decided to call DH. I tried to talk about something positive but he knew I didnt sound "positive". So I broke down and told him about the shower and decided not to go, even if I can get free lunch....He said that wasnt nice. I told him how I wished it were me, US. Then I heard someone saying they decorated the lunch room with streamers of different colors, YUCK. I feel ike I shouldnt be acting like this since I really dont know her, probably wont even see this baby, etc......Not that I dont like her, baby showers, babies, baby bumps.....I just want my own and not have to worry about being an emotional wreck. Oh, DH did say, please dont tell your job about what's going on! Of course I had to make sure he knew that our IVF treatments/IF is between him and I and my DS sista's.......No family nor best friend will know ANYTHING! With the "unpositive" activity going on here at work, DH and I finally got our house in the market as of yesterday. The "FOR SALE' sign is up and it's also online!!! I hope this sale goes fast just so it's one less stress. And we can also complete some projects we started since moving in 8/06 and do IVF!!! I just want to be completely happy! Posted on 11/04/09, 10:11 am |
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SO after speaking to my DH, crying and all, I decided to go wish the lady at my job good luck with her baby! And I honestly felt so bad for not wanting to wish her luck and enjoy a lunch with the ladies and men. I didnt stay long(only because I left my stupid insulin on my desk) I hate diabetes!!!! Im better so thanks for letting me vent! 
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GOOD FOR YOU!!!
that's hard to swallow some days, some days worse than others...I'm proud of you :)
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I completely understand how you feel. They had a baby shower for one of my co-managers and I wanted absolutely no part of it. You have to protect yourself and avoid things that hurt too much. I am proud of you for going, I am not that strong.
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i'm not that strong either....good luck to you :-)
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