Incest Survivors Support Group

Survivor:-

WTF!!! See everywhere - I hate the fact that you open up about the abuse to get the help and support you need, opening up is a very brave thing - only to be taken advantage of . Sicko's>>>>> they make out we are bad, odd wierd wrong and dirt. We are none of those things.
They are. Everyone of them.
I agree, Anger, Anger, Anger. And yes people are definitly afraid of us perhaps not understanding contributes to this. How did we endure this?

You are so strong and brave and I hear you. You still going, your not broken, none of us are, we are still here holding our ground. Standing up.
I still feel I need help but have noone so I am working through it all the time as best I can.
Again Survivor thank you for your comment, what you are saying. It means a lot.
I do need to rant and at the moment it is my specialist subject with Sexual abuse and Incest. Our f&&ked up society and systems.
Hugs and thinking of you.

Moonface:-Scary scary scary
Thank you for your comment.
Bug hugs to you.

I am sorry that you can not see how things have changed. I am so thankful I am living now and not with the attitudes of 100 or even 20 years ago. I mentioned homosexuality because like with domestic violence and rape it was considered shameful and to be hidden. There is still shame attached to all of these, but less and the pressure to hide them is less. There is more understanding, at least amongst professionals, about how victims are affected and react.

When I was in my teens I had never heard of sexual abuse, it was certainly never in the newspapers or in books. Of courses there is still much denial - especially when it concerns friends or relatives, but the fact that it is written abut and discussed means that people (who do not have a vested interest in denying it) are in general more willing to accept that it does happen. We are at the start of a change in attitudes. It may not prevent abuse or incest happening, but if it helps victims recognise what is being done to them and makes it easier for them to get help, then it has to be good.

100 years ago there was no help. No help at all for any of us. Now some of us get some and I hope that in 20 years time it will be better still.

I really dont se it.
Homesexual people are usually so because of traumatic lives. Gay through being abused, or having an absent or controlling mother etc.

I dont think it has got better - Just people are more aware.

My daughter aged 12 - is a victim and believe me nothing has changed since I was a young girl. The system still sucks big time and you are made to feel like a victim - not nice - perpertrators still have the upper hand

I appreciate your comments and am happy that you can see the betterness of it
Sorry about my made up words - its vicky dictionary :)

Off topic
- homosexuality is not caused by trauma or how someone's mother behaved towards them. Your suggestion that it is shows that attitudes and knowledge have not progressed as much as I thought.

- On topic
When I say better I do not mean "OK' or 'good enough', I just mean better than it was. Awareness is the opposite of denial. Awareness of a situation is an important step to improving situations. For this reason awareness is definitely better than no awareness.

I am so sorry to hear about your problems you and your daughter are experiencing. You both deserve all the help you need. She is lucky that, at least, she has a mother who believes and validates her.

Some people are infact born gay, but some can be gay through the fact that they have been abused as a child ir due to the fact that there mum was controlling or absent. There are other factors too and I do know what I am talking about.
That shows that progress on homosexuality has changed. You are not always born Gay.
I know. I have been brought up in a very Gay community.

Do you feel people are just born gay?
Dont tell me that what I said is not true please and why you would know what the causes are?

Sexuality is a very confusing issue especially for those who have experienced abuse.

Thank you for your comment.

I realise this is very sensitive and it is also off topic, so I have replied via PM.

My sincere apologies if anyone has been upset by the discussion - I had raised the subject not for a discussion homosexuality but as an illustration of how attitudes have changed over the years.

Yes I am upset
This was my post and all I was doing was having a rant and your telling me what is what and I was just stating my opinion.
Thats what it is we all have different opinions. Whats right or not whats proven or not.
I am sorry if anyone is upset by this. Never mind that I am.

I know that all species can be Gay too.
You didnt get my point.

I am truly sorry that I upset you. I did not intend to.

I work in an office of addiction and there are alot of therapists. The topic is uncomfortable for them. When I was in a group for smoke cessation, a woman announced she was sexually abused and the leader said that is a little bit too much information for her. I immediately felt this is not a person to trust.