What is Hepatitis B
Originally known as serum hepatitis, hepatitis B has only been recognized as such since World War II, and has caused current epidemics in parts of Asia and Africa. Hepatitis B is r...
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not sure what to do with myself
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i found out that i have hep b in 2003. Ever since, i have been in a dark world of depression. Although no one could even tell, as i go on with my life as casual and carfulL as i could. my relationships has been very distant and i have cut of relationships with some people because i cannot afford to disclose my issues.
Regardless of what some say about opening up to others, its not that easy and adviceable because most folks are ignorant of my case. i have never depended on any one, family or friends and i have made up my mind that i will not live this life in sufferage and pain or been a burden on someone's life. Am naturally not a sad person and its even hard for me to think that am depressed because i have alway been an optimistic and positive person but reality is a bitch in most cases. its sad because i cannot entertain the oppsoite sex , so i remain single. People ask me all the time and wonder why am single because according to some, am a very attractive guy.Life can be lonely, and i guess am more at peace with myself if am lonely than be exposed , tell my issues and be rejected, because ppl will reject you. Even though i have disease that can easily be prevented by immuniazaton. well.. no tsure what is going in my head , but i guess i just wanted to rant. Posted on 09/21/09, 10:09 pm |
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don't remain single my friend. if she really loves you she will accept you just tell her you are a carrier and let her get tested and be vaccinated. good luck 
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Hello UKNW, I actually signed up years ago and decided to login this evening and after reading your comments could not believe it was word for word of what I have been feeling. Just know you're not alone. I found out about 2 yrs ago after a hard break-up where my x was cheating on me...there was a lot personally in heart invested in this LT relationship that hit me pretty hard and has caused me to raise my guard more then ever before. So with the trust issue I decided to get tested so here I am today...to date although very close to my family with close friends, I have not told anyone of my Hep B. I live day to day wearing a hard shell of happiness to my friends, family, work... the strong one. While when at home, a commercial alone triggers the tears. I too have settled to be alone for now for if found in my workplace am sure would not be employed shortly there after..then reporting this in a job interview is another story. My independence without worrying about telling someone in order to prevent passing this Hep B to another is very important to me right now. Others say I am pretty but I have gained wt to avoid all together the pressures of a potential relationship....so I plug along..as the days pass I run into waves of positive thinking which is most of the time with the glass 1/2 full, but sometimes in a great while a commercial can bring the tears. I guess tonight I just needed to talk to someone. I guess this is why I am here. It helps a lot. Thanks 4 sharing your thoughts and 4 reading. -D'
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i totally understand how you feel. if you need someone to talk to, feel free to message me.
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I so understand what you are going through, feel just the same way. But it is just so very sad. It is a sad life to live alone, all on your own because of the shame. Had it been a liver disease with out being contagious it would have been a whole different story! But for how long can we keep this a secret to ourselves. The fear of being rejected and people disgusted by you... but the loneliness...
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i don't feel alone and i don't feel being rejected for some reason in fact i am happy that till now i am still alive living happily with my husband and kids...think think positive. i understand that this disease is deadly but i always pretend and think that i don't have it .
After i knew that i had it in 2005 i cried for the whole year everyday, evry hour , every minute but those days are over. I accept the disease and live my life and now well still here.
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