HPV Support Group

You can get a lot of insight just reading some of these postings and advice from this site. Very useful information, I'm finding.

Your not different from anyone else so don't let this get you down. There are more people out there with this than you know. I think it is important to tell your partner prior to sexual conduct with that person. Educate yourself so you know what the risks and factors are about HPV. That way, you can explain it to your partner a little more easily. It's not the end of the world for you, just beginning, don't let this stop you. See your doctors regulary.

Being a female, I understand your concerns...many people have asked me lately when I'm getting married....most of them don't know what I've been dealing with. I've had GW since last november and my dr. wants me to have surgery to have them removed since the 4+ treatments of having them froze off haven't really worked....but I recently met a great guy and I just felt like he liked me for me and wouldn't judge me...you just need to know and be confident in the kind of person they are and then you will know when the time is right to tell them....make sure to be educated and reassure them it's not a big deal...however if you have them you could pass them so that needs to be their choice, but if this person is who you are going to marry it really doesn't matter because even if she gets it you will be together so it's not really a big deal..there are ways to clear it by keeping your immune system up and keeping the active warts under control. I told this guy like the third time we hung out and he was totally ok with it...apparently he had dated some one before who had std's and he never got it....We have had protected sex but I still fear him getting it.....I clean the are with alcohol after sex to kill any bacteria on the surface of the skin.....if you take precautions of spreading it right after contact such as washing with antibacterial soap, using rubbing alcohol and peroxide, it should kill anything on the surface. however if you think about having kids obviously you won't be using protection...even high risk hpv can be easily taken care of because it's the slowest evolving cancer.....yes it's not fun to have to go through but with the support of a great person you can get through it...trust me.. I thought I would never find some one who wouldn't be bothered by this...just take care of you and just wait for the right timing to tell people....everything will work out, you'll see...plus getting married isn't as easy as just picking some one....if that's something you want then persue it...otherwise you need to do what's best for you and what's best for your health

Sickntired6 -

I have been trying to find answers and explanation to this problem for almos a year now, but no one has been so kind and patient to elaborate on this. i mean it - "Thank you so much"........where ever you are - your mail has given me some confidence....i cant thank you enough for this very detailed explanation. Its like you almost stepped into my shoes and read my mind to answers questions...thank you so much.

Yes - she is waiting for me. I love her. I want to marry her....

can you advice
1) How can I get to know that "this is not a big deal" - will this website help? do you recommend others?

2) I didnt understand this part
"plus getting married isn't as easy as just picking some one....if that's something you want then persue it...otherwise you need to do what's best for you and what's best for your health "

Are you saying I should first concentrate on health and thn worry abt marraige?

I don't want to step inside someone elses head and decipher what they meant....but I would guess that sickntired was referring to the fact that you made is sound as though you were being pressured by relatives to a certain degree to get married. Marriage is serious, takes work, and is complex. You should be ready mentally, emotinally, and spirutally to take that step, as opposed to deciding to get married because it is time you did that...there is no hurry. If you are in love and sure that this girl is right person, and this is the right time....your current health issues can be dealt with.

You could definately have high risk HPV along with GW. There is no way to test for high risk in males. It usually resolves fairly quickly in males, but it can take longer if you are not circumcised. GW is a bit different. It is very contagious and can sometimes come and go. The immune system does resolve it eventually, but you cannot just take a DNA test to see if the virus has resolved as with high risk. The general rule of thumb is that you should not have sexual contact when the warts are visible. Have you seen a doctor to have them removed? There are several options to do that. You should use protection, at least initially, even without visible warts. Condoms do not protect completely as this is a skin to skin virus and could be in areas not protected. They do offer about 70 percent protection, however.

This virus, both high risk and GW, is incredibly common. They estimate these days that 80 percent of sexually active people have been exposed. I agree that the time to discuss this with a potential partner is prior to sexual contact. Women are usually pretty understanding about these issues if they feel you are right person for them. You are in a bit of a different situation coming from a much more conservative society than the USA. However, everyone finds these issues difficult to discuss intially. Countless people with both high and low risk get married even while dealing with this virus, however.

Hi All,

Came to India. Met my girlfriend and told her the whole thing on my GWs. Obviously, she could not take it well. THen there were multiple questions. I tried explaining. There were 3 questions she asked and I could not answer them well. Then I realized this virus has taken over control of my life. I felt very demotivated and shattered coz i love her so much and cant go clean to her.

Her questions

1) She wants to know if just being careful during sexual contact is enough precaution?

2) She does not want to get it, even though she is ready to support me. What is the gaurantee? Generally, her immunity is bit low always...so i am worried too.

3) She wants to know if this will affect our normal lives if we live together in a marraige.

After these when she asked me "Ïf She can be taken care of by me" - i didnt have an answer. How can i answer - coz whatever i do - how can i protect her from this.

pl let me know. This is a very emotional time for me.

Should I let her go - coz this is so contagious? Will this not let me lead a normal life without thinking everyday that this could have infected her?

pl give me your answers....i love her.

Cricket100

also, after we met - we hugged , held hands, kissed each other on the cheeks. Will this infect her?

Can one of you please share your expertise..and help me please? Would be greatly appreciated to find some support....

You can't get gw from a kiss on the cheek or holding hands. It sound like she wants reassurance that she won't contract gw and ultimately it's a risk. Using condoms offers some protection but it's not 100%. Ultimately she will have to reconcile within herself to be with you she have to know there's a chance. If she can't ,then maybe she's not the one for you.

You can have a normal life with an std. It's all a matter of perspective. But if she's going to be worrying all the time then this isn't something you want to put yourself through.

i understand. I cant see her get infected from me also....its love, very difficult to see her go through something like this especially because of me...

may be i should let her go....

pl pray for me ....i wanted to live my life with her....

its the toughest day of my life. i could not see her go through a very disturbed aggitated couple of days since i told her this in detail.

also i dont think i will have the guts to see her go through stuff if things dont go well after marriage - with the hpv infection thing.

Even though the chances as i read are less than 1% for complications (pl correct my understanding if i am wrong), i dont think i should let her go through this.

So i decided to tell her to move on. Not sure if i can handle this also under the current stress.

but any words of support and encouragement wil help.